Homecoming
by RoadrunnerDM
Summary: Capt. William Adama comes home on leave, but finds that life on the homefront is beginning to change.
1. Default Chapter

**Homecoming.**

By Dana Martin

Setting: This started as a short flashback contained within another story, but ended up taking on a bit of a life of its own. Takes place primarily about 20 years before the Colonial Holocaust, then finishes shortly after episode 5, "You Can't Go Home Again."

Rating: PG

Disclaimer: Based upon characters and situations created by Glen Larson and Ron Moore, and the other staff writers of "Battlestar Galactica", past and present. I have no financial or legal claim for the use of these characters – I'm just bringing them out to play.

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Chapter 1

Wizard's career was in trouble. He had bounced yet another landing on the Galactica and the Commander wasn't going to put up with it for much longer. The young pilot tried harder than anyone in the squadron, but he just couldn't seem to get the hang of a hands-on landing. Husker had worked with him on numerous occasions, taking him step by step through the process, but the rookie just couldn't get it right. It seemed to have become a mental block of some kind. He handled his viper just fine in flight, but he consistently choked on the landing, miscalculating his distance, altitude, or speed, or some combination of all three. It was a shame. Husker liked Wizard, and he was a very bright kid... but if he couldn't manage to smooth out his landings, Husker knew the commander would insist on having Wizard transferred to another post where "lazy-ass auto-landings" were acceptable.

Unlike the newer line of battlestars coming out of Geminon's ship works, the Galactica had no auto-landing system. The Galactica's pilots still had to bring in their ships the "old-fashioned" way and Commander Mance insisted that they do it right. Hard landings were hard on both pilots and machinery alike. A pilot who couldn't make a reliable landing was a danger to himself and his fellow pilots, not to mention a burden upon the deck crews who would have to repair the damage done to a multi-million credit fighter craft. Mance was annoyed to no end that new pilots were not even coached on hands-on landings in basic flight school anymore. That skill had recently been pushed off to advanced fighter training, a notion that Commander Mance found absurd. William "Husker" Adama, the Galactica's Commander of Air Group, had to agree. What more basic skill did a pilot need than to be able to land safely? But someone, somewhere in the fleet hierarchy had decided that the technique was no longer so essential, given that all the new battlestars had the capability of taking over a viper's controls and landing the craft neatly and safely without any intervention from the pilot. The older battlestars, including the Galactica, were slated to be retrofitted with the auto-landing systems, but it would likely be years before the entire fleet was completely updated.

Commander Mance and Captain Adama were of the "old school" of viper pilots, veterans of the worst days of the Cylon War. There had been no auto-landings in those days. The human brain was the only computing mechanism that the Cylons could not compromise; therefore ultimate control of all systems was left to humans, not to computers. The notion of installing a computer system designed to completely take control of a fighter craft away from its pilot would have been unthinkable. Now however, 17 years after the end of the Cylon War, it was considered the state of the art and the wave of the future.

"Fools," William muttered, shaking his head. "They're fraking fools, and one of these days it's going to come back to bite us all on the ass."

"Bill, the boys may be outside, but I'd still prefer not to have that kind of language in the house."

"Sorry," he said to his wife. "But it's true. Mark my words, Caroline, it hasn't even been 20 years, and we're already surrendering control of vital systems to machines again. Didn't we learn the first time? And we have so-called pilots coming out of flight school only half-trained. They're sending them out in vipers – _combat_ spacecraft – without even teaching them how to land! It's insane! Lords forbid that we should end up facing another war any time soon, because none of these kids would last a week. A pilot who isn't safe in the cockpit and fully in control should never be given his wings!"

William took a long drink from his ale mug and set it down with a frustrated thump on the side table. He looked up to see his wife sitting in the chair beside him with her arms and legs crossed, staring back at him. She didn't look at all happy. "What?" he asked.

She sighed and shook her head. "You haven't been home yet for even half a day and already your mind is back on the ship. Or did you even leave it in the first place?"

William sat forward to explain, but tried to keep his voice as conciliatory as possible. "I have a pilot," he said. "He's a good pilot in every other respect, and a damn hard worker, but he just can't control his landings. I'm going to have to recommend dismissing him from the squadron." Without being aware of it, his voice gained in intensity. "I hate to do it, because I really don't think it's his fault. If he'd just been properly trained in the first place... But, he isn't safe. Yet I know some other CAG on some other battlestar is going to take him and slot him full-time because on _their_ ship he won't _have_ to know how to land... until the fraking auto-landing system fails and the kid ends up spattered across the flight deck!"

"Bill..." Caroline said in warning.

William suddenly became aware of somebody chuckling behind him. He turned around to see his youngest son, Zak, standing there, grinning broadly.

"You owe me a cubit, Daddy," the boy laughed. At six years of age, Zak still had that little-boy chuckle that forced an instant smile onto the face of anyone who heard it.

"Excuse me?" William said, smiling now despite his recent near-tirade.

"You said a bad word," Zak told him. "You owe me a cubit." He held out his hand expectantly.

William looked back at his wife. "Is this something new?" he asked.

Caroline sat back in her chair and returned his gaze smugly. "You were warned to watch your language. Pay up, Husker."

Amused, William turned back toward his son. He made a show of patting down his pockets. "I don't have any money."

"Check your wallet," Zak said with a smirk, as if that conclusion should have been obvious.

"What makes you think I have money in my wallet?"

"That's what wallets are for," Zak said. "Or you could check the bowl on your desk. That's where you always empty out your pockets."

William spared an amused glance toward his wife. She just grinned. "You're not going to get out of this. Kids see and hear everything, and they never forget."

"They must get that from their mothers," William commented, pushing up out of his chair, resigning himself to having to pay his son a cubit as penance for bad language.

"They certainly don't get it from their fathers," Caroline responded, glumly.

William realized from her statement that he was in some kind of trouble with his wife, but didn't want to pursue the subject in front of Zak. Besides, the boy was already latching onto William's sleeve and tugging him toward the study where he knew any money in William's possession could be found. He let Zak lead him to the other room where he fished a cubit out of the bowl on the corner of his desk. He handed over the shiny coin.

"All right," he told Zak, "you win. You and Lee ever catch Mommy swearing?"

Zak smiled. "Sure, but only when she's driving. I usually sit up front, so I catch her a lot more than Lee does."

William bit back a laugh. Caroline was usually a very easy-tempered, well-mannered person, but the traffic in Herald City could inspire a saint to curse the ears off a marine, especially during rush hour. It was just one of the things that Caroline did not like about living there, but it couldn't be helped. This was where the fleet had assigned them housing, so this was where they had to live. Even advancing up the ranks to the position of CAG had not afforded William enough of a salary to purchase a home outside of military housing. Caroline would have to go to work for them to afford a place of their own, and William, old-fashioned though it might be, did not like the idea of his wife working, at least while the boys were still so young. Perhaps in a few more years, once Lee was older and could be entrusted to look after his little brother for a few hours in the afternoons, they could reconsider her employment status. But by then, William hoped to be promoted to the rank of Major, and the salary increase might be sufficient to buy a home in a nice quiet area, and Caroline wouldn't have to work after all. Until then, Zak would continue to fill his piggybank with cubits from cursing parents.

Adama regarded Zak curiously. "You ever owe Mommy a cubit?"

"Almost," he said.

"What do you mean, 'almost'?"

"It didn't count, cause I didn't know it was a bad word. But Lee did, and he taught it to me, so he had to pay her instead."

William did laugh at that, though he knew he shouldn't. He didn't want to give Zak the impression that cursing was funny, but Zak was just so gleefully innocent about it that William couldn't help himself. "And where did Lee learn this bad word from?"

"From Peter, where else?" Zak said, pocketing the coin. "His dad curses a lot, especially when he comes home late and can't walk straight."

That raised alarm bells in William's head. "Who is Peter?"

"The boy next door."

"The one Lee is outside playing with right now?"

Zak nodded. "He's one of them."

William affectionately ruffled his son's unruly dark hair. Zak's hair was almost black, like his father's, and had the tendency to stand straight on end, making it look almost comical if it wasn't kept trimmed quite short. Lee's hair was more like his mother's: dark blonde and wavy. In the summer months, when Lee spent more time outdoors, his hair would turn very pale blonde, and his resemblance to his mother was striking. Caroline tended to let Lee's hair grow longer than Zak's since it lay down nicely and didn't imitate a little porcupine. Zak's shorter cut was more like military regulation, enhancing the impression that Zak was a miniature version of his father. But looks aside, William had always thought that in personality Zak was more like his mother, while Lee took after him. Zak was the bubbly, vivacious one, always smiling, but sometime impetuous. Lee was more reserved, focused, and dependable. If either of the boys was ever going to get into trouble, it would be Zak. Lee would be the one rescuing his brother from his latest misadventure. But this news about Lee's playmate had William a bit concerned.

"Did you finish your homework?" William asked, leading Zak out of the study.

"Almost," Zak said after a pause.

"Almost, huh? That's another way of saying, 'No'. Hop to it, Warrior. See if you can finish up before dinner."

"Is that when you're going to give Mommy her present?"

An alarm of a totally different sort sounded off in William's head. "Present?"

"Yeah," Zak said. "Her birthday present. Lee said you must have something pretty special to give her since you were waiting until you got home to give it to her instead of sending it through the mail last week."

Frak!

William checked himself to make sure he hadn't said that out loud. He nearly owed Zak another cubit. "Mommy's birthday present... well Zak, I do have something special in mind," he fibbed. "But I think I'll wait until tomorrow, when we have the whole day to celebrate."

The boy seemed satisfied with that explanation. "Should I keep it a secret then?" Zak asked.

"Yeah," William said. "Let's keep it a secret." He gave the boy a pat on the rump to hustle him off to his room and finish his homework.

As soon as Zak's door was closed, William swore quietly, "Oh frak." No wonder Caroline had been so chilly towards him since he got home that afternoon. It hadn't been just his imagination. She really was angry. No, not really angry so much. She was hurt. That was worse. Much worse. And rather than arriving with flowers, or a present, or even acting happy to be home, William had been moody and tired, showing up and asking for a cold ale while complaining about Wizard's bad landings.

William was in it deep, and he knew it.

So now what?

"Think fast Husker," he told himself. "I could slip out right now and get... what?" There wasn't time before dinner to pick up anything more than a cheap bouquet of flowers at the market, which would be just the same as admitting he'd forgotten all about her birthday. Maybe he could duck out in the morning, before she woke up. Not likely. She'd notice. He had one chance. Maybe he could convince her, as he'd convinced Zak, that he planned all along to celebrate her birthday that weekend, after he got home. The odds were slim, but it was worth a shot. If that didn't work, there was always the fallback plan: begging forgiveness.

William crept back to the living room, trying to eliminate all traces of guilt-riddled fear from his face, but Caroline wasn't there. She hadn't passed the study, so she must have gone into the kitchen to check on dinner. He approached the doorframe connecting the kitchen to the small dining area that was adjacent to the living room. He peeked inside the kitchen, scoping out the potential for hostilities in the territory. Caroline was crouched down, checking the temperature of a roast in the oven. She was humming a popular tune, which was a good sign. She wasn't too angry... at the moment. Gathering his courage, William decided to engage his objective.

He strolled into the kitchen, and as casually as he could muster, he told her, "Smells great. You always have had a way with roasts. Beauty, brains, and great roasts. What more could a man want?"

Caroline winced, but looked amused. "You silver-tongued devil," she said playfully. "How can a girl resist a line like that? He loves my roast." She shut the oven door and reset the stove-top timer.

He offered a self-deprecating smile then walked up behind her and wrapped his arms about her waist. "I have been a bit of a grump since I got home, haven't I?" He placed a gentle kiss on her cheek.

She sighed. "It usually does take you a few hours to transition back to reality. I should be used to it by now."

William thought that was a bit of an odd remark. Reality? Did she think life in the military was just a bunch of boys playing with big, loud, expensive toys? Better not pursue the subject. The last thing he wanted was to pick a fight, since he was already at a point loss.

He hugged her to him and told her, "I just don't want you thinking that I'm not glad to be here, with you and the boys. It is nice to be home. And...," he paused to give her a kiss on the side of her throat, "in spite of how preoccupied I was earlier with the job, I don't want you to go on thinking that I must have forgotten your birthday. Sorry I didn't mention it sooner. I thought we could spend the whole day tomorrow, celebrating."

"The whole day?" she asked dubiously, but showing interest.

"Yep," he said. "We'll start early, eating breakfast out, so there won't be any cooking or any dishes at all to worry about. Then we can take a drive up the coast, to the Riverwalk Market in Caprica City, where you... you get to pick out anything you want from that Highland jewelry dealer that caught your eye last Founder's Day. I remember how much you liked those pearl earrings, but I couldn't remember if you preferred yellow or white gold, so I figured I should let you choose. Then we can turn the kids loose on the beach, and catch an early dinner by the lighthouse. Then if we're really lucky... by the time we drive home, the boys will be so tuckered out we can put them to bed early... and then the party can really begin."

He waited for a response. He'd thought it came off pretty nicely.

Caroline let out a slow breath. "Zak reminded you, didn't he?" When he didn't abruptly deny it, she nodded and stepped out of his embrace. "Nice try, Bill. You should have kept the tale simpler and just settled for a family day out. I might have bought it. But the pearl earrings at Riverwalk Market? Too much embellishing, especially when I know perfectly well that we can't afford them."

She turned toward her husband with her arms crossed and a stern expression on her face. "You know, I should have just gone along with it, played dumb, and seen just how far you'd be willing to go to avoid apologizing to me, but I'm not in the mood to play games, and our bank account couldn't support it."

William Adama was a seasoned combat pilot. He'd flown into the fiercest battles of the Cylon War with no hesitation. He'd charged headlong into danger, outnumbered, against an enemy intent upon blowing him into cosmic dust. He'd been decorated for valorous service and bravery. He was a true warrior and a Colonial hero. But facing his wife now he felt like a coward standing about 2 centimeters tall.

He resigned himself to the backup plan. "I'm sorry Caroline. It's not that I _forgot_ your birthday... I just didn't remember it in time."

In spite of herself, Caroline couldn't help laughing at that. Her expression softened and she shook her head with a weary smile. William knew he was still in trouble, but at least she didn't hate him.

He approached her and laid his hands on her shoulders. "I really am sorry. I'm not going to try to make excuses. I screwed up. That's a fact. All I can do about it now is to try to make it up to you."

"By bribing your way back into favor?"

"I really would like to buy you those pearl earrings," he said earnestly.

She looked thoughtful for a moment, almost tempted, but then shook her head. "No. We need the money for too many other things."

"I didn't think expenses were that tight," he said. William had always known he would never get rich in the military, but he certainly expected to be able to provide for his family.

"The bills are getting paid," she assured him. "And the boys certainly aren't going hungry, though Lee seems to have a hollow leg these days. But..."

"What?"

"There's not a lot left over, Bill. The boys are growing. Lee's already outgrown every pair of pants that I bought him at the beginning of the school year. I try to save what I can, but at this rate... it'll be a very long time before we have enough for a down payment. And I'd much rather have a house than a pair of pearl earrings."

She stepped around him to get to the refrigerator. She took a large stock of broccoli out of the produce drawer and shut the refrigerator door. William noticed a new collection of drawings posted on the door with magnets, and walked over for a closer look. The artistic technique, if that was what it could be called, looked to be the same in all the drawings, indicating that only one of the boys had contributed to the family art gallery. There was one sketch of a dog, and another drawing of a large red flower underneath the words, "Happy Birthday Mommy." The others were all drawings of Colonial Vipers in various stages of flight. One even had a nameplate under the cockpit that read, "Husker."

"Who did these?" William asked.

"Zak," Caroline answered, breaking the stock of broccoli into florets over a large bowl.

"All of them? None of them are Lee's?"

She chuckled. "Lee's too busy playing sports these days to bother with drawing pictures. I have to practically order him to slow down and come in for dinner most of the time. And I swear he can wear out a pair of sports shoes in the blink of an eye. He's already on his third pair this year. I certainly don't remember having that much energy as a kid."

"Too bad we can't bottle it somehow," William commented. "We'd be moving into an ocean view mansion by next month."

Caroline smiled, but only briefly. "We don't need a mansion, but I'd certainly like the boys to have a real house to grow up in while they're still young enough to enjoy it. And maybe we can't do it by next month but... we might manage it by next year... if I go back to work."

William turned toward his wife, but she was still intent on tearing apart the broccoli. "I thought we'd already decided this. The kids are too young to look after themselves and we don't want them being raised by somebody else."

Without altering her attention from preparing dinner, she told him, "I have an opportunity to work part time. I could see the boys off to school in the morning, put in six hours on the job, and be finished in time to meet them when they get home. They wouldn't be handed over to anyone else and they wouldn't be letting themselves into an empty house in the afternoon. With your paycheck we could keep covering the bills, and mine could go straight into savings for a down payment. We might still need a special loan program for first-time buyers, but I think... I think we could do it."

William swallowed hard, trying to ignore the knot that was building in the pit of his stomach. "You've obviously given this a lot of serious consideration."

"Yes, I have," she confirmed.

"Where would this job be?"

"The university medical center. The day manager for the oncology staff is an old classmate of mine. Morning and midday are their busiest hours in the chemotherapy ward and some days they don't have enough hands to get all the patients tended to in a timely manner. Some patients have to actually wait for a couple of hours before they get their treatment started."

"Chemotherapy?" William grimaced. "You'd be dealing with cancer patients all day?"

She tossed the last floret into the bowl with a sharp flick of her wrist. "Cancer isn't contagious Bill."

"I know that, but..."

She finally turned to face him, with a hand on her hip. "But what?"

"Wouldn't that get... horribly depressing? Is that the kind of thing you want to be doing right before coming home to your kids?"

Her face grew intensely angry. "Does combat tickle your funny bone? I've never once questioned your ability as a father based on your profession. Personally I find saving lives to be much more uplifting and positive for the kids to hear about than war!"

"I'm not questioning your ability as a mother," he argued.

"Like hell you're not!"

"Caroline... I know that you are a wonderful mother. I'm sorry if my comment made it sound otherwise... but I don't think this is really the right time."

"Why not? You'd prefer the boys to grow up in this cookie-cutter housing block in the middle of a huge concrete slab? I want them to have a real house, with a yard, and trees and grass... to live in a real neighborhood, where they don't have to dodge military transports on the way to school."

She hadn't said the words, but what William heard was, "_I'm not happy with the life you've provided Bill, for me or for your children_." What he said in response was, "I'd like all that too."

"Then what are we really arguing about here? My potential job... or your pride?"

He couldn't admit it, but she'd hit the target dead-on.

"That's it, isn't it? You think it shows some kind of failure on your part if your wife has to go to work." She shook her head in exasperation. "Why can't you understand that this really isn't about you at all? It's about me and the boys. We're the ones who live here. You only visit."

William flinched, but Caroline wasn't done yet.

"You live on a battlestar, in a tiny cubicle, surrounded day and night by the military machine. You're used to it. And if the boys want to choose that life for themselves when they grow up, that's fine, but for now, we can do better by them than this. They don't have to live like warriors yet... and neither do I."

William couldn't say a word. Her words had stung... hard... but he could find no logic to refute them. There was still one other point, but he almost hesitated to voice it. Finally he said, "I'll be eligible for promotion to Major in just under two years. If I'm selected, my posting will undoubtedly change shortly after. That means..."

"We'll have to move," Caroline concluded for him.

"Yes," he agreed. "So, would it really make much sense to buy a place a year from now if we'd only be moving again a year later? That's assuming that I do get promoted, of course."

"You will be," she said quietly.

William did not overlook her quiet statement of support. "As a major, I'll be making a lot more money. We should be able to afford a house and you won't have to work."

Caroline's shoulders sagged. There was a glisten to her eyes that William knew were suppressed tears. She was trying hard not to cry. "Did it..," she started to say, then had to clear her throat. "Did it ever occur to you that perhaps I _want_ to work? I do want a house... I want to get out of military housing... I want the kids to get out of here... that's all true. But I also _want_ to work."

William appeared flummoxed. "Why?"

"I'm an educated, highly-trained medic. I worked very hard to get my degree, but for almost 10 years now my skills have gone completely unused. I have to visit with the neighbors to have an adult conversation. And as much as I adore my children, the fact is that... I'm bored! The boys spend most of the day at school, and when they come home they do their homework and play with their friends. After dinner is family time, but until then I basically have nothing to do all day but laundry, and I hate laundry!

"Bill... make no mistake... I am very proud of you. I'm very proud of what you do. I am honored to be your wife, but there's a lot more to me than just the fact that I'm married to you. I'm a person in my own right... separate, distinct, and independent from everyone else... at least I _used_ to be. I need to feel that way again."

When he just looked back at her, silent and solemn, she added, "There's no need for you to feel threatened, you know. I'm not telling you that I want out. I don't. But when you're on duty, you lead a life all your own that does not include me. You can't expect me to just put my life entirely on hold while you're gone, just waiting for you to come home again. I need to have a life too... even if at times it doesn't include you."

William said nothing. What could he say? _Me man. You woman. You stay home. You cook. Ugh._ Yeah, that would go over really well.

She'd said he didn't need to feel threatened. But in truth, he did. She wanted to live a part of her life without him. Why wouldn't he find that frightening? Sure, he did have a life away from home. He couldn't deny that. And he was away quite a bit. Maybe that was the problem. If Caroline started to experience a life elsewhere, she might decide that she liked it. And she was quite a beautiful woman. On base, she was known as Husker's Lady. The other military men knew they could look, from afar, but they would instantly sacrifice their careers (if not body parts) if they so much as tried to touch. But off base, at a university, she would undoubtedly attract attention from men at every turn; men who were not restricted by military protocols... educated men... men who earned a great deal more money than William did... men who would be able to spend a great deal more time around his wife than William could.

She didn't want out... yet. But was this the beginning of the end?

He wanted to find some reasonable, non-archaic argument for why she should not take the job, but any such reasons completely eluded him. What could he say?_ I don't trust you to be faithful. I don't trust you to properly look after our children. It's too much responsibility for you to handle._ None of those statements were true. And if they were... nothing would send her packing faster. William had to admit it. The only way to keep her was to _stop_ keeping her. After that, all he could do was to be the best husband and father he could possibly be... and hope that that would be enough.

"So," he said quietly, "how many times have you rehearsed this discussion?"

She seemed relieved by his non-combative tone and placid expression. "I have no idea," she answered. "I lost count days ago. How'd I do?"

"Well if you didn't have a job offer as a medic you could definitely find work as a lawyer." He was heartened by the minute smile creeping back onto her face.

"Does that mean I won my case?"

"No," he said. Her expression grew guarded for a moment before he added, "That would imply that I lost." He stepped up close to his wife and peered sincerely into her vibrant blue eyes. "I haven't lost anything here... have I?"

Caroline's eyes grew misty. She shook her head, whispered, "No. You haven't." With only another moment's pause, she wrapped her arms about his neck and hugged him tightly.

William pulled her body firmly against his and held her. He tried to rationalize away his concerns, but couldn't quite banish the worrisome voice in his head that told him things were beginning to change, and perhaps not for the better... at least not for him. For now though, Caroline was still his, they had 2 beautiful, healthy sons, and his career was continuing to advance. Life was good.

They heard the front door open and close. Caroline gave William a quick kiss then stepped out his embrace to peer out the kitchen door. "Lee?" Their eldest son had just come indoors after hours of chasing around with his friends. His hair was wind-blown, clothes disheveled, and his face was flushed. She hadn't thought it was growing cold outside, but Lee looked a little chilled. She checked her watch. "I'm actually _not_ going to have to beg you to come in for dinner today?"

Lee's eyes tracked from his mother's face to looking over her shoulder, where he could see his father watching him. "I... I just remembered," he said. "I have another homework assignment. I know I said earlier that I finished, but I forgot... I have to read another chapter in my history book. I'll do it now Mom."

"All right," she told him. "Dinner will be ready in about 20 minutes."

"Lee?" William called to his son.

Lee had just turned to head for his room. He stopped and almost hesitantly looked back at his father. "Yes Sir?"

"Check on your brother," William said. "He's supposed to be finishing his homework too. Make sure he's not dawdling with something else."

Lee nodded obediently. "Yes Sir." He headed for his room.

William chuckled and shook his head. "Okay, that can't be normal."

"No, it isn't," Caroline agreed. "He usually doesn't slow down for one minute before he has to come in and eat."

"No, I mean... the boy _wants_ to finish his homework instead of play? I know Lee has always been dependable with his schoolwork... but that's just plain weird."

Caroline punched William on the arm. "He may not look much like you, Bill, but right there was the definitive proof that he's yours. If he has any lingering responsibilities, he just can't allow himself to relax and have fun."

William shrugged. "I may sometimes be a bit of a workaholic these days..."

"Sometimes?"

"...but not when I was only ten years old."

"He's still nine," Caroline said dryly. "_That_ birthday you haven't missed... yet."

William caught the barb and winced, but tried not to dwell on it.

"Besides," Caroline went on, "you're the one who's been drumming into his head since the day he was born about duty... responsibility... study hard... excel... the academy has high standards... you have to be ready, so you must start early. Now you're griping about the fact that he's doing what you've always demanded him to do?"

"I'm not griping," he said defensively. "I'm... _pleased_ to see that Lee takes his responsibilities seriously. It's just not something I expected to see from a _nine_ year-old. And I started drumming it into their heads early because I figured it would take a while to sink in. I didn't bother to pay much attention to my grades until the latter half of secondary school, and by then it was almost too late. I barely made it through the doors to the academy. I don't want the boys to make the same mistake. They're both very bright and there's no reason they shouldn't be at the top of the class."

"So because Lee isn't making your mistakes, that makes him weird?"

"No," William explained. "Okay, it was a bad choice of words, but you must admit, you're not likely to see that kind of behavior from any of his friends."

Caroline conceded the point. "True enough. But I would say that makes him _special_, not weird."

William smiled at his wife's protective nature toward their children. "Yes... it does." He watched her as she returned to the task of making final preparations for dinner. "Speaking of Lee's friends, I'm a little concerned about this boy that Zak told me about. Peter?"

Caroline set the broccoli into a steamer to cook. "What about Peter?"

"Well, it sounds to me like he's a bit of a bad influence on Lee. And do we really want him to be playing with a boy whose father a foul-mouthed sot?"

"What?" Caroline turned around to face her husband, instantly assuming an irritated posture with hands on her hips. "I may not have heard the conversation but I know for a fact that Zak told you no such thing."

"Not in those exact terms, no. But the man does drink, doesn't he?"

"Sometimes," she said. "But so do you. The first thing you wanted coming through the door this evening was a large, cold ale!"

"Having one drink and coming home staggering drunk are two completely different things. A man who loses control like that... is someone who can't be trusted, and is not someone I want our children to be around."

Caroline's face grew stone serious. "One word... Paul."

William blinked. "Paul? Paul Tigh? Paul isn't a drunk, Caroline."

"How many times have you dragged him home at the end of an over-indulged evening?"

"Those are very rare occasions," William said in defense of his long-time friend.

"Our wedding being one of them," she said pointedly. "How many grooms leave their bride alone on their wedding night so that they can put their Best Man to bed?"

William grimaced and rubbed his forehead. "Paul felt terrible about that."

"Yes, I'm sure the hangover was a doozy."

"And he has sincerely apologized to you a hundred times."

"Which is part of the reason why I don't mind that you still consider him a close friend. You can look the other way when it comes to Paul's drinking. How can you be so judgmental about a person you don't even know? Karl Mormont is a very decent man. Yes, he sometimes gets carried away with the crew on Friday nights, but that's it. And Peter is a very nice boy who is certainly not a bad influence on Lee."

"What about the foul language Lee was brining home from him?"

Caroline rolled her eyes. "Zak just heard worse from _you_. Besides, they're _nine_! Weren't you and your friends fascinated by dirty words when you were that age? They know perfectly well it isn't acceptable. I'm quite clear with the boys on that. But that's why they find it interesting, and you know it. Admit it. You did the same."

William had to admit she had a point there. Lee might be special, but he was still a nine year-old boy. He tried to think back to his own childhood, when he had been Lee's age. That was before the Cylon War had begun. That was when it was still all right to play outside without having to listen for the alarms and sirens that told them it was necessary to move to shelters. Back when he could still be just a kid. Back before he had to become a survivor. It seemed _so_ long ago... a totally different lifetime... almost like the memory of a movie that he'd seen rather than a life he had actually lived. He tried to remember what it had been like when he was just young and carefree... but it was very hard to do. The war had changed so many things. It had certainly changed him.

Not noticing the solemn memories playing out across her husband's face, Caroline chuckled. "At least be grateful that Lee isn't trying to sneak dirty magazines into the house yet."

"What?" William said, coming rapidly back to the present.

"Oh, come on," she teased. "All boys do it and he's just about at that age you know."

"What age?"

Caroline laughed. "You know... when girls start losing their cooties and boys start getting genuinely curious. I know he'll be at the looking stage for a while before he starts really thinking about touching... but... have you thought about when you might want to sit down with him and have... _The Talk_."

William froze. "_The Talk_?"

"Yes, Bill._ The Talk_. Boys... girls... babies..."

"Babies?" he nearly shouted. William's head was spinning now. "He's nine!"

"Almost ten. That puts puberty right around the corner."

_Puberty_? "He's nine!"

Caroline almost doubled over laughing at the expression of terror on William's face. "You don't have to sit down with him _tonight_. I'm just saying you should start thinking about it."

"He's nine!"

She threw up her hands, still laughing. "Fine. I'll take care of it. Maybe you should sit down, Warrior. You look a little pale. I'll let you know when dinner is ready."

William nodded, feeling almost dazed. He walked back into the living room and dropped onto his chair. What was left of the ale in his mug was warm now, but he downed it anyway. He'd walked in the door that afternoon expecting to come home and find everything in its place, just as he remembered it. His beautiful wife. His loving children. A modest but comfortable home. No pressure. Relaxing. A vacation from responsibilities. Nothing to worry about.

Now he was worried about his wife running off with a brain surgeon and his nine year-old drinking with the neighbors and getting hooked on pornographic magazines.

Yes... things were definitely beginning to change.


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2**

When Caroline called the boys, Dad included, to the dinner table, William had begun to regain his equilibrium a little. This at least was familiar and comforting. As always, Zak came tearing down the hallway from the boys' bedroom, latched on to his father's arm, and skipped alongside William for the short walk to the dining table. Lee followed shortly after, typically less excitable than his little brother, and took his place quietly at the round table. William sat with his wife on one side, and Zak on the other. Lee sat between his mother and Zak. Caroline spoke a brief prayer of thanks to the Lords of Kobol that her family was all joined together that night, happy, healthy, and with a bright future ahead. With thanks concluded, they settled down to eat.

William took a bite of Caroline's roast and savored the moment. She wasn't a fancy cook, but William didn't have fancy tastes. Dinner was just the way he liked it: simple, good food. He watched his kids eating for a minute. Zak was struggling a little, but doggedly intent on spearing a piece of broccoli onto his fork. He finally had to use both hands to control the positioning of the food on his plate, while happily chewing away. Lee, for all of Caroline's comments earlier about his hollow leg, didn't seem very interested in eating. His left hand sat in his lap, under the table, while he idly poked the fork around the plate with his right. He took one small bite and chewed slowly, as if he was bored.

"So Lee," William asked, "did you finish your reading?"

Lee looked at his father and said quietly, "No Sir. Not yet." His eyes returned to his plate, but he only pushed the food around, instead of taking another bite.

"Zak, how about you? Did you finish your homework?"

Zak stabbed a piece of roast and stuffed it into his mouth before it could elude his fork. "Almost," he mumbled, with a mouthful.

"Zak, chew your food and swallow before you speak," Caroline instructed him.

"But Daddy...," Zak stopped, swallowed, then said, "Daddy asked me a question."

"He'd have waited until you swallowed," she told him. "And the answer would have been easier to understand."

William tried to keep the amusement from showing on his face. "So, you're still _almost_ finished?" He turned his attention to his older boy. "Lee, didn't I ask you to check on your brother and make sure he was doing his homework?"

"Yes Sir," Lee said sullenly. "And I did. But I had my own work to do. I can't just stare over his shoulder all the time to make sure he's doing math instead of drawing more pictures."

William regarded his first-born. "I don't appreciate the sulky tone, young man. A simple answer to my question was all you needed to say."

Lee stared at his plate.

"Are you listening to me Lee?"

"Yes Sir," he said, still staring downward at his largely untouched meal.

"Look at me when I'm talking to you," William said in a firm, though not harsh, tone.

Lee swallowed, though not because he'd been eating. He looked at his father's face, his bright blue eyes opened wide.

"Are you listening to me?" William repeated.

"Yes Sir," Lee dutifully repeated his answer, facing his father.

William nodded to him, and Lee's eyes immediately dropped to the tabletop again. Goodness, the boy was moody that night. "Now I want you both to buckle down and finish your homework right after dinner, because I want you both to get to bed early tonight."

"Awww," Zak protested. "But you just got home and we don't have school tomorrow. Why can't we stay up late and watch a movie?"

It was a family tradition for when William came home. They would all crowd together after dinner on the couch, turn out the lights, and watch a movie. When they were both younger, the boys would predictably fall asleep long before the movie was over, and Caroline and William would just sit contentedly through the evening with their sleeping children cuddled between them. These days, Lee usually stayed awake until the end, but Zak typically still nodded off and would have to be carried to bed.

"We'll have movie night before I go back on duty, I promise," William told Zak. "But I want you boys to go to bed early tonight, so that we can get up early tomorrow and take Mommy out for breakfast." He noticed Caroline's eyes were fixed on him, and she was listening carefully for what he would say next. "I missed her birthday last week," he said. "So, tomorrow is Mommy's day off. After breakfast, we'll go spend the day at the beach. All right?"

Zak grinned excitedly. Lee said nothing, but looked like he was bitterly disappointed.

Zak eagerly asked, "Can we go out and look at the tide pools?"

"If it's low tide, sure," William told him.

"I wanna catch a sand crab," Zak said, biting into another mouthful of roast.

William looked at Caroline and raised an eyebrow, silently asking, "Is that okay?"

She smiled in response, reaching under the table to take his hand and squeeze it.

Feeling a little more secure about the whole family situation now, he ventured to ask his wife, "So when do you hope to start your new job?"

"The 21st," she told him. She began to tell him about her encounter with an old school friend a few months back, which had led to a discussion about part-time workers needed at the university medical center. She told William all about the facilities, and the other staff members that she had already met. There was a sparkle in her eyes when she told him, her excitement about the job showing plainly on her face.

As he listened to her going on and on it began to dawn on him that she had planned to take the job all along. He glanced at the boys, who weren't reacting at all to the news that their mother would be working soon. It was not a surprise to them. That meant she had already discussed it with them. The boys knew all about it. William realized that Caroline had not been asking his permission earlier, she was simply giving him advanced notice. He felt a sharp pang of anger toward her, briefly, which was quickly accompanied by an equally sharp pang of remorse. She didn't need his permission. She was his wife, not his property, and she had waited to discuss it with him before officially accepting the job offer. The situation might have bruised his pride a little, but that was the only harm done. The kids weren't worried about it. Why was he? It would impact their lives much more than his, and there was definitely no concern being shown on their part. Zak was just contentedly clearing his plate, even humming a little tune. Lee was... well Lee was still rearranging the food on his plate instead of eating it.

Apparently noticing William's attention on Lee, Caroline looked at her son. She too saw that he'd barely touched his dinner. "Lee?" she inquired. "You've hardly eaten a thing."

The boy looked at his mother and nodded. "I'm just not very hungry."

"After running around all afternoon? You should be famished." She reached over to feel his forehead. "No fever."

Lee hesitated a few seconds then said, "Peter's mom made some cookies. I guess I shouldn't have had so many."

"Lee, did you spoil your appetite?" William asked, looking sternly at his son.

"Yes Sir," he admitted, facing his father without being instructed to this time.

"How many did you eat?" Caroline asked.

"Six... I think."

"I didn't get any," Zak complained.

"You weren't around," Lee retorted.

"Six?" William was mildly amused but hid it from his face. It was instruction time again. "Lee, your mother put a lot of time and effort into making a very nice dinner for all of us this evening. It's very inconsiderate of you to go spoiling your appetite and showing your mother that you don't care how hard she works to provide for you. Now you owe her an apology."

Lee didn't hesitate at all to look at his mother and say, "I'm sorry Mom." His face was so earnest, and his voice so remorseful that William suddenly felt guilty for the lecture. Was he being too hard on the boy? It was just a late afternoon snack, after all. Hardly cause for a flogging. But Lee almost looked like he expected to be hauled off to prison. He wasn't crying, but he looked close to it. William hoped that wouldn't happen. If there was one thing that William simply couldn't handle, it was seeing his children cry.

Caroline brushed Lee's sun-bleached blonde hair back from his forehead. "It's all right Sweetheart. Apology accepted. Thank you."

Lee looked back at his plate. "May I be excused?" he asked quietly. "I'd like to finish my homework."

Lee didn't appear to be on the verge of tears any more. He had fought back that urge and bore a much calmer expression now. William was glad for that. Husker Adama could face a squadron of Cylon raiders, but he couldn't face a child in tears. His brain would just scatter and then shut down leaving him with no idea how to deal with it. Thank goodness his boys were not whiners, but they had not been allowed to be. Right from the start, William had insisted that no tantrums of any kind were to be tolerated. Whiners and brats would never become warriors. They had to be strong and responsible for their actions. It was both expected and demanded of them. But there were still circumstances when children's tears were inevitable: a scraped elbow, a nightmare, a frightening encounter with a hostile dog. When those happened, William couldn't fault the children for crying, but he was grateful that Caroline knew how to deal with it so that he wouldn't have to. He knew it was cowardly on his part, but it was something he was not equipped to cope with.

Now that Lee was no longer teary-eyed, William was inclined to deny the boy's request to leave the dinner table. This was his first evening home in more than four months and family dinners were meant to be shared by the entire family. Lee might have spoiled his appetite, but he could still at least do the family the courtesy of joining them at the table. But before William could respond, Caroline had already spoken up.

"Are you feeling all right?" she asked.

Lee nodded. "Yes Mom." That was all he said, but it was apparent to William that Lee was ill at ease over something. William wasn't home enough to be the best judge of the boy's behavior, but this didn't seem normal to him. Lee had never been the bubbly chatterbox that Zak sometimes was, but he wasn't a gloomy, moody child either. Was this a phase that Lee was going through these days? William looked to Caroline, since she certainly knew Lee's recent moods much better than he did, and her puzzled expression confirmed to William that Lee was not quite himself that evening.

"Lee?" he asked, trying not sound as though he was about to embark upon another lecture. "Is there something you'd like to tell us Son?" As he waited for Lee to respond, he thought the boy's expression started to turn emotional again, but then Lee blinked and faced his father calmly.

"No Sir," he answered. "I just have a lot of reading left to do if I'm going to finish in time to get to sleep early."

William was struck by how _professional_ his son's response had sounded. He'd actually sounded like one of the pilots in the Galactica's squadron responding to a question in a mission debriefing. Was the boy really only nine?

"All right then," Caroline told him. "You're excused. Just take your plate and leave it by the sink."

Lee slid his chair back and placed his utensils on his plate. He lifted the plate from the table with both hands, _very carefully_, almost absurdly so, as if one fallen crumb would land him behind bars. He carried the plate into the kitchen, so intent on balancing the plate that the concentration was visible on his face. When he reemerged from the kitchen he passed the dining table and headed straight for his room without paying his parents or brother even a passing glance.

William sat back and looked at his wife. "What the hell is up with that boy?"

Caroline's protective maternal instincts kicked in. "Up with him?"

Zak chuckled. "Daddy you owe me a cubit."

"What?"

"You said another bad word."

"I said a...? All right Zak, I'll pay you right after dinner." Then William asked, "Zak, did Lee mention anything to you about something happening at school?"

Zak shook his head. "Nope."

"When do report cards come out?" he asked his wife.

"Three weeks," Caroline answered. "Why?"

"Is Lee having trouble with his schoolwork?"

"No. You saw how diligent he is about his homework and his test scores have been fine."

"Are you sure?"

"Yes, I'm sure." Caroline's voice was slightly terse in her reply. "The boys always show me when they get their tests back."

"Always?"

Caroline crossed her arms. "What are you trying to imply?"

"Well," William suggested, "maybe the reason he's diving into that book so hard tonight... cutting playtime short, ducking out of dinner... maybe it's because he didn't do very well on a recent test, and he's embarrassed to admit it, especially in front of me."

Caroline thought about it, but then shook her head. "I don't think so. He had a history test just last Friday, and he got it back 2 days ago. He got a 95. He shouldn't be having another test until next week."

"Pop quiz maybe? Unexpected... he hadn't studied... maybe it shook him up a little."

"He wouldn't bother to hide it," Caroline replied.

"Are you sure?"

"Positive," she said, notably annoyed now.

"Then what _is_ he hiding?"

"The boys never hide anything from me," Caroline declared. "Do you Zak?"

Zak smiled slyly. "No."

"And why not?" Caroline further prompted him.

Zak laughed. "Because you always find out anyway."

"That's right," she nodded her approval of a lesson well-learned.

William tried to control the extent of his grin. "Ah, but you did say earlier that Lee was approaching that age where boys start trying to hide things from their mothers."

"Schoolwork is not one of those things," Caroline declared. Then it was her turn to grin. "Unless... you're implying that we should double-check that history book and make sure he isn't using the cover to hide some other kind of reading material."

William's eyes widened again at the suggestion that his little boy might be growing up faster than expected, in ways that William was not prepared to deal with. "No, I don't think that'll be necessary," he said.

"Or maybe...," she suggested, "he's dug out the pages and has a flask hidden in there that he gets refilled when he's over at the neighbors'."

"All right..."

"OR... maybe he's really compiling a long list of obscenities that he overhears while hiding in a dark corner at the officer's club in the middle of the night so that he can corrupt the impressionable mind of his little brother."

"Were you trying to make a point?"

Caroline looked her husband straight in the eye. "You can trust your son, Bill. He's a good boy. Stop jumping to conclusions that he's done something wrong. All he did was admit to eating a few cookies and ask to be allowed to finish his homework. So save the handcuffs for another time."

William watched as his wife broke eye contact with him and resumed eating her meal. Family conversation at the dinner table appeared to be over for the evening.

Once again, William wondered if he was being overly hard on Lee. Caroline was right, Lee hadn't really done anything wrong, but there had to be some reason why the boy was so moody. If not school.. .then it must be related to the family. If it was something in the family... _Am I the reason Lee is so uneasy tonight?_ he wondered_. I have done little more than lecture him since I arrived. Does it make him that uncomfortable to have me home?_

It certainly hadn't always been that way. He remembered vividly those previous homecomings when both Zak and Lee would come running out of the front door to greet him, grabbing on to him excitedly, and he would have to carry both boys back into the house at the same time. They would be clamoring all over him for hours, both competing for room in their father's lap while he told them all about life on a battlestar and flying vipers. Lee would beg for piggyback rides or for wrestling time on the living room floor. And when it was time for bed, Lee would snuggle up under his arm for a bedtime story that would always see him nodding off before the hero ever managed to slay the evil wizard.

When had all that changed? Why had it changed?

* * *

Caroline stepped into the bedroom and closed the door just as William was toweling his face dry. He didn't usually bother shaving before going to bed, but he didn't usually have a beautiful woman going to bed with him. Nine to ten months out of the year was spent sleeping alone on a single-sized, military-issue mattress with nothing but fond memories and photographs for company. But William wasn't sleeping alone tonight, and he planned to do a lot more than just sleep. 

"The boys are asleep," she told him, walking over to the closet.

"Did Zak ever get his math finished?" he asked with a laugh.

"Yes," she smiled. "Along with a nice new collection of pictures on the back page of his notebook." She took off her blouse and pants, hanging them up neatly.

"And Lee?"

Lee never had emerged from his room that evening, even after Caroline told him that he could still have dessert despite the fact he hadn't eaten dinner. Lee had declined. That had worried her enough to take Lee's temperature, but there had been no sign of a fever.

"He fell asleep in bed with his history book," she told William. "He didn't put it down all evening. I can't believe his teacher really assigned _that_ many extra pages on a Friday. Frankly Bill, I'm a little concerned."

From the corner of his eye William saw Caroline remove her bra and slip her nightgown on over her head. His pulse quickened for a minute as he reached for his toothbrush. "You're concerned because he enjoys reading history?"

She joined him in the bathroom and found her own toothbrush. "I'm concerned because he seems to be hiding himself away for some reason. I think something is upsetting him."

"You're the one who said he can be trusted not to hide anything," William pointed out, and set about brushing his teeth.

"I know," she said. "But he's been such a recluse this evening. It's not like him."

William rinsed out while Caroline brushed away. "Well... I'm sure it's nothing to be worried about. If he's not likely to hide a pop quiz from you, he wouldn't hide anything really important. Would he?"

Caroline rinsed out. "No," she said, though she didn't sound very certain any more.

William had already discarded his uniform tunic and undershirts. He stepped up behind his wife and ran his hands along her bare arms. "Relax," he said, his voice growing husky. "After a good night's sleep, I'm sure Lee will be back to his old self. Tomorrow he'll be chasing seagulls, burying Zak in the sand, and eating enough for ten nine year-olds again." He gently pressed a kiss to the side of her throat.

She sighed, and then smiled. "You're probably right. Hey... I thought the party was supposed to get under way tomorrow night."

His arms embraced her waist and pulled her snugly against him. "Any reason we can't do a little early celebrating?"

She kissed him on the lips, very briefly. "Yes. Family Day tomorrow. No work. No discussion of work. No griping about work. No reminiscing about work. No lecturing to the boys about work. Just you and me, and Zak and Lee. Got it?"

"Got it," he confirmed.

"Good," she told him, stepping out of his arms. "Because I want my present before you get yours." She walked away from William to her side of the bed and climbed under the covers. Switching off the light on her nightstand, she said quietly, "Good night Bill."

William sighed inwardly. Yep, if children never forgot anything, they definitely got that trait from their mothers.

* * *

William dragged one eyelid open. It wasn't easy. He'd been sound asleep and it was still deep into the middle of the night. But Zak was standing there at the side of the bed, nudging his arm and insisting that William wake up. "Zak?" William growled sleepily. "What's wrong Son? Bad dream?" 

Behind him, William heard Caroline stirring. She sat up. "What's wrong Sweetheart?" she asked.

Zak sniffled. "Lee's crying," he said, sounding very upset.

"Lee's crying?" Caroline was immediately on the move, throwing aside the covers and climbing out of bed. She headed out of the bedroom door with Zak right behind her.

William laid there for a minute, still trying to clear the cobwebs out of his head enough to wake up. He knew he should probably get up and go see what was happening, but Caroline was already on the job, and he knew he was totally inept at dealing with crying children anyway. Most likely Lee had simply had a bad dream, and had inadvertently wakened his little brother. A few minutes with Mommy and both boys would be back sound asleep in no time.

The next thing he knew he was being roughly awakened again, by Caroline, who was yanking on his arm to get him up. "Bill, get up! Now!"

"Wha- what's wrong?" He shook his head, yawning.

"Get up," she repeated. "We have to take Lee to the hospital."

That brought William rapidly to wakefulness. "What? What happened?"

"I think his arm is broken," Caroline had already dragged a pair of sweatpants and a baggy sweatshirt out of a drawer and was pulling them on. She grabbed her shoes and slipped them onto her feet without worrying about socks.

William was stunned. "What do you mean his arm is broken? It's the middle of the night. What the hell happened that he broke his arm in the middle of the night?" He moved rapidly to retrieve a set of his own workout clothes, since they would be faster to pull on than his uniform.

"He said that he fell," Caroline answered.

"He fell? Fell out of bed?"

"No, not out of bed."

"Then what was he doing?"

"I don't know!" she nearly shouted at him. "We can worry about that later. Right now your son needs to get to a doctor. Now are you coming or not?" She didn't wait for a reply. She just hurried back out the door to the boys' room.

William's head was spinning. He dressed as quickly as he could, and then hurried after his wife. Lee was sitting up on the edge of his bed, still wearing his pajamas and cradling his left arm. There were tear stains covering his cheeks, and his breath was catching every few seconds. He was still crying, but very quietly. There was no wailing or complaining going on, such as William had feared there would be. Caroline was kneeling in front of him, putting his shoes on. Lee glanced up at his father standing in the doorway then dropped his head and wiped at his face with his sleeve. The tears stopped.

Caroline spared her husband a brief glance. He was still standing in the doorway, clueless over what he should do. "Bill, get Zak's shoes please. And his coat."

William followed his wife's instructions, fully content to let her take charge of the situation. He focused on getting Zak at least partially dressed. Zak sat on his own bed on the other side of the room, and the younger boy was deeply distraught. As William got Zak zipped into his coat he tried to ease the boy's mind. "It's all right Zak. Lee's going to be fine." The words had little effect, however.

Caroline hadn't even attempted to get Lee's coat on him. She draped it over his shoulders and kept her arm around him. "Can you walk to the car Sweetheart? Or do you want Daddy to carry you?"

William saw Lee's distressed eyes look up at him briefly then turn quickly away. The boy sniffled and told his mother, "I can walk." William felt a pang of disappointment, but said nothing as he watched his son stand up and walk, slowly, cradling his injured arm, while his mother walked immediately beside him. He took Zak by the hand and followed.

Caroline sat in the roomier back seat with Lee, keeping him tucked protectively under her arm. Zak rode up front, while William drove. It wasn't far to the base hospital. The drive would only take about 10 minutes, but William had to resist the urge to gun the engine just the same. It would be better to take the drive nice and smoothly than to scream around corners for the sake of saving a minute or two. His nerves were jangled, but he didn't want the kids to see that. He heard Caroline behind him, talking softly to Lee. Though William heard an occasional sniffle, the boy was being remarkably quiet. He hoped that wasn't a sign that something more serious was wrong with Lee. He told himself that Lee was a strong boy, and that was all it meant. _Don't let your imagination run away with you, Husker,_ he thought to himself. _Lee will be fine._

Zak was another story. They had gone only a few blocks when Zak started to cry. William didn't know what to do. Zak wasn't the one who was hurt, but he was tired and scared for his brother. It was the middle of the night and they were on the way to the hospital. No six year-old would find this a happy situation. William was at a total loss. He didn't blame Zak for being upset. Hell, _he_ was upset. But he had no clue how to deal with Zak.

Thank goodness Caroline had a better handle on the situation. "Zak, Honey it's all right," she told him, from the back seat. "Your brother is going to be fine. We're just taking him to the doctor where they can make his arm feel all better again."

"That's right," William agreed. He felt like he had to say something. "There's no reason for you to cry Zak. You're not even hurt." He hadn't intended to sound cross, but even to his own ears he knew that was how it came out. Zak quieted down a bit, but he didn't stop crying. William's anxiety level edged upward a notch.

They caught the traffic signal at one of the base's main intersections and had to stop and wait. The opposing traffic was virtually non-existent, and William was tempted to run the red light, but decided against it. It would be just his luck that a base marshal was watching somewhere and would pull him over. He could probably beg off a citation by pointing out that he had an injured child in the car, but overall it would just delay their arrival at the hospital. Better just to wait. Lee was holding up well enough. There was no need to start getting reckless.

As he stared at the signal, waiting for it to turn green, William tapped the steering wheel restlessly. He hated waiting. It was the middle of the night. Zak was still crying. And he had no idea what the frak had happened with Lee. Finally, he just had to loose some of the tension and ask, "Damn it Lee... what the hell happened? What were doing that you broke your arm in the middle of the night?"

"Nothing," Lee answered quietly.

"Nothing? Your arm just broke for no reason?" William hadn't wanted to sound so harsh, but he would not stand for having his children lie to him. "What were you doing?"

"I fell," Lee answered, starting to sound upset.

"Fell doing what? Were you sneaking around somewhere?"

"No," Lee said, his voice quavering now.

"Bill... later," Caroline interjected.

"No, I want an answer," he said. William's flayed nerves just wouldn't allow him to leave it alone. "The boy has to learn what it is to be responsible for his actions. Now Lee, you've caused the whole family a lot of trouble here young man. You've dragged us all up in the middle of the night. Your brother is upset. And the doctors are going to have to spend time taking care of you instead of looking after warriors who have been injured in the line of duty, serving the colonies. Now tell me what you were doing up and around in the middle of the night!"

"I wasn't," Lee cried, sounding absolutely miserable now. Zak also started crying harder.

"Were you sneaking to the kitchen, since you didn't eat your dinner when you were supposed to?"

"No," Lee said.

"Were you trying to sneak out with that neighbor boy... Peter?"

"No!" Lee insisted, his voice breaking.

"Bill! That's enough!" Caroline insisted.

"I want an answer," William declared.

"Later!" his wife growled, sounding angrier than William had ever heard her. He started to protest again, but she abruptly interrupted. "So help me, Adama... one more word out of you now... and you'll be spending the remainder of your leave sleeping on the front doorstep," she hissed.

The signal finally turned, and William drove on, in silence. He could hear Lee crying behind him now, though not nearly as loudly as Zak was crying. Caroline was talking to Lee, softly, in the kind of comforting tone that belongs to mothers alone. William felt terrible. He knew he'd made everyone, including himself, feel even worse about the whole situation. But he just didn't know how to handle these things. When problems came up within a squadron, especially when someone got hurt, you fixed it by identifying what went wrong, making sure everyone knew where the error occurred, and educating all parties involved in order to ensure that it didn't happen again. That was just how it worked. That was the only way William knew how to deal with a crisis. By the book. But obviously military procedures didn't translate well into dealing with children.

When they pulled up in front of the hospital a few minutes later, Zak had quieted down a little, and Lee had again stopped crying altogether. William brought the car around to the curb by the emergency room door. He got out but ended up only standing by while Caroline steadied Lee, who got out of the car by himself. Caroline walked their eldest son inside while William got back in the car and drove around with Zak to the visitor parking lot. Then he took Zak by the hand and returned to the emergency room. He spent the next 15 minutes trying to find out where his wife and son had gone. Finally, one of the nurses who had met Caroline and Lee at the door told him that Lee had already been taken down the hall to have his arm imaged. Luckily it was a slow night, so they'd been able to look after the boy right away.

It was almost 20 minutes later before another nurse caught William's attention in the waiting area. "Captain Adama?" she called.

"Yes," he responded. He nudged Zak, who had already begun to doze off on the couch next to him.

"Your wife and son are right down here Sir," she said, waving for him to follow her.

Zak was rousing groggily, so William just picked him up and followed after the nurse. They were ushered into a small examining room, with two beds that could be separated for privacy by a curtain running on a track in the ceiling. The other bed was empty for the time being, so the Adamas had the room to themselves. Lee was lying down, with his left arm propped up slightly at his side, wrapped up on a board. It had not yet been set into a cast. Lee was calm, and awake, but the sight of his little boy in a hospital bed twisted William's gut. Caroline stood next to Lee's bed, looking very tired.

Zak twisted around in William's arms for a view of his brother. "Lee?" he called worriedly.

Lee looked at his little brother and told him with remarkable maturity, "I'm okay Zak."

That seemed to be all that Zak needed to hear. He put his head down on his father's shoulder and closed his eyes, drifting right off toward sleep.

"Any status?" William asked his wife.

Caroline looked at him coolly. "You have someplace else to be right now?"

William chose not to chew on that stinger. "I just want to know how my son's treatment is progressing," he said in measured tones.

The tension in her face eased away. "They're studying the images," she said. "At first evaluation it didn't appear too serious. Not a bad break at all, but..."

"But what?" he asked, growing concerned.

"There's an awful lot of swelling," she said. "Normally that would indicate a more serious break due to the irritation of the tissues by the bone fragments. But with a break that serious... well Lee would have been in a lot more pain."

William looked at his son. Lee had hardly cried at all through the ordeal. In fact, most of the tears had been prompted by his father's interrogation in the car. William felt even worse about that now that he could see his son's face. Lee was lying there very quietly, but he looked miserable. And even though Lee was not complaining, the swollen, broken arm had to hurt. The boy might have a lecture coming, but William had chosen absolutely the wrong time and place for it. He wanted to hug Lee, and tell him that he was sorry. But he was still holding Zak, and he was also leery of disturbing Lee's splinted arm. He promised himself he would do it later.

A doctor came into the room and nodded to the family. "Captain? I'm Doctor Bernard," he introduced himself. "I met your wife when she came in with Lee."

"Nice to meet you Doctor," William said. "I'd shake your hand, but..."

The doctor smiled. "Yes, I can see you have your hands full. Well I have good news, and not-so-good news. The fracture is a simple one. We should be able to set it pretty easily, and it should heal just fine. He'll need to wear a cast for about four weeks. At that point we'll take another look to verify how it's healing and determine if any kind of brace will be needed, but that's probably unlikely."

The doctor turned his attention directly to his young patient. "Lee... that means you're going to have to sit it out on the sidelines for about a month. I know you're not going to like that. Your mom says you're quite the little athlete, but until that bone is mended, you have to take care of it. All right?"

Lee nodded, but he couldn't hide his disappointment. "Yes Sir," he said.

The doctor smiled at the formality of Lee's reply. "I'm a civilian son. You don't need to salute me."

"Was that the not-so-good news?" William asked.

"'Fraid not," the doctor replied. "We can't properly set the bone or put on a cast until the swelling comes down. We're going to apply some ice to his arm and give him some anti-inflammatory medication, but it could take several hours."

Caroline nodded. "I suspected as much," she said.

William shouldn't have been surprised that his wife expected that news. She was a medic herself after all. He just wished that she'd clued him in in advance. Lee was going to have to stay for several more hours yet? That didn't sit well with him at all. Lee didn't look happy about it either.

The doctor excused himself, with a final note that a nurse would be by shortly to start applying the ice. Caroline thanked him, and then turned to her husband. "Why don't you just take Zak home? Put him to bed. I'll call you when there's an update."

William didn't feel right about leaving his son behind at the hospital, but with another child to consider, it seemed to be the best course of action. Lee wouldn't be alone. William knew perfectly well that Caroline wouldn't leave his side for a minute. Still, he felt guilty about going. He nodded to his wife then stood beside Lee's bed. His son was not looking at him. He seemed to be purposely avoiding looking at his father.

"Lee?" William called gently. "I'm going to take your brother home now, but... I'll be back soon to take you home too."

Lee nodded, then still without looking up at his father he said, "I didn't mean to make you mad Sir. I'm sorry."

William felt awful. Again, he wished his arms had been free so that he could hug Lee without hesitation, but once again it would have to wait. "We'll talk about that later Son," he said. "I'll see you soon."

Caroline leaned over to give Zak a quick kiss on the cheek before William left. Then he turned to leave. As he reached the examination room door he saw that a nurse had been standing there, observing the family. He inclined his head politely to her as he passed her and left the room.

He never saw the look of suspicion that she favored him with as he carried Zak down the hall.


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter 3**

It was still not even quite dawn when a nurse removed the ice pack from Lee's arm to get a look at how they were progressing with the swelling. Caroline leaned over to see for herself and smiled. The swelling was noticeably reduced and she passed that news along to her son.

"It's looking good," she told Lee. "Maybe another hour or so, and I think they'll be able to finish up."

The nurse nodded her agreement. "I think so. Lee, we'll let your arm breathe for about 15 minutes or so, and then put the cold pack back on. Okay?"

Behind them, Doctor Bernard came back into the room with another woman who was dressed in a civilian business suite. She was an attractive woman in her mid-forties with a comforting smile. They directly addressed their patient instead of his mother. "Lee, this is Doctor Warner," Dr. Bernard told him. "She just wants to ask you a few questions. We're going to have your mother step outside with me for a little bit while the two of you talk. All right?"

Caroline glanced suspiciously between the two doctors, but didn't want to say anything to alarm her child. To her son she said, "I'll be right back Lee. You go ahead and talk with the doctor." She smiled at him, masking any suspicion from her face until she was outside the room. But as soon as she was beyond Lee's sight and hearing she asked Dr. Bernard, "What's going on?"

Dr. Bernard told her solemnly, "We just have a few questions regarding the nature of your son's accident."

"Excuse me?" Caroline asked. She didn't like the sound of this at all. "What kind of questions?"

"I think you should wait to discuss this with Doctor Warner after she has had a chance to talk to Lee."

Caroline crossed her arms. "Exactly what kind of doctor is she?"

Doctor Bernard explained, "Doctor Warner is our resident pediatric psychologist, and she also works with the Department of Family Services."

Caroline felt the color drain from her face. She herself had worked in the medical community and she understood exactly what was happening. She just couldn't believe it was happening to her. "You think that Lee has been abused?" she asked in a tight voice.

"We aren't making any accusations Mrs. Adama," Dr. Bernard.

She shook her head in disbelief. "Not yet, but that's exactly what Doctor Warner is asking Lee isn't it?"

* * *

Zak had fallen right off to sleep as soon as William put him back to bed, but William himself had been too restless to lie down. He settled in on the sofa and switched on the broadcast box, flipping channels idly until he came across an old movie that he hadn't seen in years. After just a few minutes, he was only paying scant attention to the old flick, his mind drifting. Eventually he dozed off, but it was not a restful sleep. He was roused from a shallow dream when the movie ended and was followed by an infomercial whose sound volume was dramatically higher than the regular programming. He blinked and rubbed his eyes. The sun was coming up. He checked his watch, realizing it had been almost three hours since he'd left Caroline and Lee at the hospital. The doctor had said it could be several hours before they could set Lee's arm into a cast, but William had still half-expected Caroline to call with updates in the interim. Then he remembered Zak. It was still quite early, and Zak was still sound-asleep. If they were still waiting for the swelling in Lee's arm to subside, Caroline might well avoid calling William so as not to waken Zak. 

William flipped through a few more channels, but found little to watch aside from more infomercials. Frowning, he hit the power button on the remote and heaved himself to his feet. Shuffling to the kitchen, William switched on the coffee maker. While waiting for the pot to brew, he found himself studying the collection of drawings decorating the refrigerator. A lone viper in flight. A squadron in formation. A viper launching from a battlestar. William smiled. Zak's fascination with vipers was obvious, not to mention his penchant for drawing. He knew that Lee's interest in flying was just as acute, but William's eldest son was much more practical about it. While Zak fantasized about being a pilot through his artwork, sometimes to the detriment of his schoolwork, Lee immersed himself in his studies and in sports, actively preparing himself both mentally and physically for the challenges of the military academy. William didn't want to dampen Zak's enthusiasm, but he wondered if perhaps he should have a talk with Zak. Childhood fantasies were all well and good, but they would never become reality if Zak didn't learn to set the distractions aside and focus on his priorities. The boy would have to start accepting that math and science were more important for pilots than art.

His two boys were so different. Lee was the driven one, while Zak was a dreamer. Lee seldom needed to be instructed on anything more than once, while Zak frequently needed to be led by the hand to stay on course. Caroline did a fine job with the boys, but William still wished he could play a more consistent role in their upbringing. He was away from home so much. Still, so long as Lee continued to set a good example for his younger brother, William felt a little better about Zak's prospects. That was what made William so uneasy about the events of the previous night. Lee had let him down. Lee had broken his father's trust. What had Lee been doing in the middle of the night, and why did he refuse to own up to his actions? Was Lee starting to go through a rebellious phase? The last thing Zak needed was to see his older brother becoming a troublemaker. The younger boy would undoubtedly follow suit. Both boys could have such bright and honorable futures ahead of them in the service of the Colonial Fleet if they could just stay focused. Whatever Lee had been up to, William knew he would have to get to the bottom of it and put a stop to it right away. The guilt William had felt earlier at the hospital over his reprimands to Lee was replaced now by a solemn resolve. There could be no wavering on this matter. He would not tolerate any such behavior from his children.

"Daddy?"

Zak's voice surprised William. He'd been certain that Zak was still sound-asleep. "Hey there Warrior," he greeted his youngest. "Couldn't sleep?"

Zak shrugged. "Are we still taking Mommy out to breakfast this morning?"

William checked his watch. "Well, I don't know Zak. I guess that depends on how soon Lee is able to leave the hospital. You hungry?"

Zak nodded.

William wasn't sure what to do at first. He doubted that either Caroline or Lee would get anything to eat at the hospital. They would both need to eat as soon as Lee was released, but Lee might not feel up to going out anywhere. The boy would undoubtedly be tired and hurting and should probably be put right back to bed. And it could still be hours before Lee was able to come home. William finally decided there was no point in making Zak go hungry in the meantime.

"All right," he said, "let's see what we can find you for breakfast."

"What about Mommy and Lee?"

"I'll make something for them when I bring them home. How about some eggs?"

William's culinary talents were limited, but he did know how to scramble a few eggs. He had been a bachelor once, after all, and bachelors have to eat too. Though, while on duty aboard a battlestar the kitchens were manned by a large, efficient staff of cooks who kept the entire crew fed three square meals a day. He served up the eggs for Zak, with a couple pieces of toast, and by then found his own stomach starting to growl. He went ahead and tossed a few more eggs in the skillet for himself.

After eating, he sent Zak off to get dressed and washed up. His eyes flicked back up to the clock. Still no word from Caroline. He told himself that no news was good news, and that he just needed to be patient. There was no cause for worry. Surely, if there had been a problem with Lee, Caroline _would_ have called. He took the time to catch his own shower and don a fresh set of clothes, then settled in on the couch with Zak trying to find something on the broadcast box that they both could watch.

It wasn't until mid-morning that the phone finally rang. William had been watching the clock nervously off and on all morning, and had just begun to get genuinely worried over the lack of news. He jumped up from the couch to grab for the phone. "Hello?"

"Bill, it's me," Caroline's voice announced, sounding a bit odd. Her voice was tense and low. "Lee is about ready to come home. Why don't you drop Zak off with the neighbors and then come get us."

"Zak's wide awake," he told his wife. "He's been up since dawn. I'll just bring him along."

"No," she said sharply. "Let him stay with the Mormonts. We need to talk. I'll meet you out in front of the ER."

William felt a chill run down his spine. Something was wrong. "Is Lee all right?"

"He will be," she said cryptically, then hung up.

William hung up the receiver slowly. What in Kobol's mercy was going on?

"Was that Mommy?" Zak asked.

"Yes," William answered. "Um... Lee is ready to come home, but there's some... paperwork and things that need to be taken care of. Zak, I want you to stay with the neighbors while I go back to the hospital and finish up with the doctor."

"I wanna see Lee," Zak protested.

"You'll see him soon enough," William declared.

"Why can't I go with you?"

"They're very busy over there now Zak," William answered testily. "I can't be keeping one eye on you while you try to wander off to go exploring. And don't try to tell me you wouldn't. Mommy and Lee will both be home very shortly."

"But..."

"Enough Zak! A warrior does not question his orders. Now let's go." He grabbed the keys and strode toward the front door. Zak followed, sullenly, shuffling his feet over the short distance to the neighbor's residence.

An attractive young brunette with curly hair answered the door very promptly after William knocked. "Good morning," William greeted her, suddenly realizing that he had no idea what her name was.

"Oh, Captain Adama... good morning," she said cheerily. "I know we've never met, but I recognize you from all the family pictures. I'm Sheila Mormont." She extended her hand in greeting, and William shook it firmly. "It's a pleasure to finally meet you. Good morning, Zak."

"Hi Mrs. Mormont," Zak replied. "Can Peter play?"

"He's in his room, but I think you'd better ask your father..."

"Actually Mrs. Mormont..."

"Please call me Sheila."

"Sheila... I was hoping that you wouldn't mind if Zak stayed here with you for a little while. I need to fetch Lee and Caroline home from the hospital."

Her face showed immediate concern. "Nothing serious I hope."

"Lee broke his arm," Zak announced.

Sheila Mormont winced. From behind her, another young voice asked, "He broke it?" A young boy about Lee's age stepped forward to stand beside his mother in the doorway.

"Yeah," Zak told the boy, sounding morbidly excited about the previous night's events. "And it got all swolled up, so they had to keep him at the hospital all night."

"Ewww," the neighbor boy responded. "He said it didn't even hurt that much."

"Excuse me?" William asked.

"Oh Captain, I'm sorry," Sheila said. "This is my son, Peter. He and Lee play together all the time. Peter, this is Lee's father, the famous 'Husker' Adama."

A large grin broke out across the boy's face. "Hello Sir," he said.

"Hello Peter," William said, suddenly realizing this was the boy whom he'd been so concerned might be a bad influence on Lee. He certainly didn't look like a neighborhood hoodlum. He just looked like any regular nine-year old kid. But there was the matter of what Peter had just said that worried him. "You said that Lee told you his arm didn't hurt much?"

Peter nodded. "Yeah. He said it was sore, but that it was no big deal. We all thought he just twisted it a little."

"We?" William questioned him further. "Who is 'we'? And when was this?"

"Yesterday," Peter answered. "When we... Lee and Jack and Steve and me... we were playing ground ball, like we always do. Lee had the ball and Jack tagged him. He landed kinda hard and said his arm hurt a little, but he got right back up. He even tried to run a few more plays before he said his arm was too sore... but we didn't think it was _broken_."

"And this was yesterday... _afternoon_?" William asked.

"Yes sir," Peter answered.

William's stomach did a summersault, but he managed to hide it from his face.

"He's okay, isn't he?" Peter asked.

"He'll be fine," William answered. "Though, he won't be playing ground ball with you for about a month or so. I'm going to go pick him up right now," he turned his attention back to Peter's mother, "assuming you don't mind looking after Zak for a bit."

"No, of course not," she told him with a warm smile. "Peter, why don't you and Zak go play in your room, okay? Captain, please tell Lee that we're hoping he feels better soon."

"I will. Thank you."

Zak scampered off after Peter and William headed off alone to the family car. He slipped behind the wheel and pulled the door shut with a loud bang. Then he sat for several long seconds just staring straight ahead.

Lee had broken his arm while playing with his friends, then come into the house... and said nothing to his parents. He'd told them he had homework instead of revealing the fact that he was hurt. It explained so many things. It explained Lee's total loss of appetite at the dinner table. William was certain now that Sheila Mormont had never baked any cookies, or even if she had, Lee had not spoiled his appetite on them. It explained Lee's moodiness and his desire to leave the table, hiding out in his room, even turning down dessert. It also explained why the arm was already so swollen when they took him to the hospital. But despite every question answered, William was still left with one. "Why?" Why had Lee intentionally hid his injury from his parents until Zak tattled on him in the middle of the night? It made no sense. The boy had been in pain for hours. Why didn't he just say something?

William finally turned the ignition and started the car moving. He still felt rattled by Peter's revelation, but Caroline was waiting for him so he didn't want to keep dawdling in the driveway. He guessed now what Caroline wanted to talk to him about before they took Lee home. He caught a red light at the same intersection where they'd had to wait the night before. Waiting again for the light to change, William was vividly reminded of the accusations he'd made to Lee at that very same spot.

"_Were you sneaking to the kitchen, since you didn't eat your dinner when you were supposed to?"_

"_No."_

"_Were you trying to sneak out with that neighbor boy...Peter?"_

"_No!" Lee insisted, his voice breaking._

"_I want an answer," William declared._

William had his answer now, but it didn't make him feel any better.

* * *

Caroline was pacing on the sidewalk when William arrived at the hospital a short while later. "We need to talk," she said grimly as he approached. 

"I know," he told her. "I talked to Peter when I was dropping Zak off. He told me how Lee hurt his arm."

She tilted her head. With biting sarcasm, she said, "You realize you just left your youngest, impressionable son in the home of a foul-mouthed sot?"

Fine. William knew he'd over-reacted earlier with his impressions of the Mormont family, but William refused to take the bait. "Caroline, are we going to talk or fight?"

She closed her eyes and took a very deep breath. To his amazement, William suddenly realized she was crying though she was trying very hard to stay in control. He also noted that she looked very, very tired. "Bill...," she said in shaking voice. "I just spent two hours this morning talking to a military marshal and a pediatric psychologist from the Department of Family Services... trying to convince them that we do not beat our children... and that you were not the one who broke Lee's arm."

William's jaw dropped. "Wh-what?" he stammered. "Wh-why the frak would they think - Lee was playing..."

"I know that!" she half-yelled, then caught herself, and forced a sense of calm back into her voice. "I know what happened now. Lee finally explained. The doctors were just being cautious. When they saw something suspicious, they had to look into it."

"What's suspicious about a boy playing a game of ground ball?" William asked, still utterly mystified. "Little boys fall down all the time."

Caroline hugged her arms about herself tightly. "They saw a boy with a broken arm... who had gone nearly ten hours without his parents seeking any medical aid... whose parents could not readily provide the doctors with an answer as to how the injury occurred... and who was overheard in the emergency room apologizing to his father for making him angry."

William felt as though he had just been kicked in the gut. For several seconds he even found it difficult to breathe. "I... I would never... EVER..."

"I know that," Caroline said again, though this time she just sound plainly exhausted. "I talked with the doctor from Family Services... and the marshal... and after they interviewed Lee a couple of times, they were finally satisfied the situation was nothing for them to be concerned about. However, the doctor did suggest that we consider family counseling."

William shook his ahead, growing angry now that the shock had begun to recede. "Great! They realize they made unfounded accusations, but still want to keep their noses stuck into our business. I suppose if we decline, they'll also consider that 'suspicious'."

Caroline's shoulder's drooped with fatigue. "She was concerned... as am I... that our son chose to hide from us the fact that he was injured. Don't you find that just a little bit alarming Bill?"

"That doesn't mean we need a headshrinker dissecting our private lives," he answered, dodging the question slightly. "Lee's a tough little warrior."

Caroline cringed. "He is not a warrior! He's a nine year-old boy! Good Lords Bill, you almost sound like you're proud of the fact he landed himself in the hospital!"

"Don't be absurd. I don't want Lee here any more than you do!"

"Lee never hides anything from me. Aren't you even curious about why he tried to hide _this_ from us? Doesn't that matter to you?"

How could she ask that? William had puzzled constantly over just that question since the moment he'd left the Mormont's front door. "Of course," he responded gruffly. "Did he explain it?"

"The psychologist asked him, when she was trying to determine why we didn't bring him to a doctor sooner."

"What did he say?"

Caroline's gaze dropped to the ground. It was several seconds before she answered. "He said... he said it was because of you. If you hadn't been home, he would have told me... but he was afraid of being a disappointment to you. He didn't know his arm was actually broken. He thought it was just twisted, maybe sprained. He didn't want to complain about it with you at home, because you would think he was weak... and you be would be ashamed of him. So he did what he thought you would want him to do... be a _tough little warrior_." Those last words had been spoken harshly and on the verge of more tears.

For a long time, William could not voice a reply. Just last night over dinner he had asked himself, "_Am I the reason Lee is so uneasy tonight?_ _Does it make him that uncomfortable to have me home?_" Apparently, Lee was uneasy enough that he was even afraid to reveal the fact that he was injured.

_He would have told Caroline. But not me._

"Your son is afraid of you Bill," Caroline said pointedly. She held up a hand to fend off his immediate denial. "He isn't afraid that you'll beat him. He knows you won't hurt him. But he is afraid that you won't love him unless he shows you that he's the perfect little warrior you've always tried to mold him into being since the day he was born. But he isn't a warrior Bill! Not yet! He's a _child_, who right now just needs to know that his father loves him, and will always love him, no matter how imperfect he may turn out to be."

William rubbed at his eyes and looked skyward for a moment, trying to gather his thoughts and settle his churning nerves. "Did you... did you tell him... that I love him?"

She regarded him with a serious eye. "That's your job. I told him that _I_ love him, no matter what, and that there should never _ever_ be _anything_ that he should be afraid to tell me. Now it's your turn."

William simply nodded by way of reply and walked deliberately toward the emergency room door. Caroline fell into step right beside him. As they passed into the bustling waiting area William realized how fortunate they had been the night before that the doctors had been able to tend to Lee right away. The ER was much busier now, with numerous patients and families all waiting for treatment. Nearing the nurses' station, William thought he detected a few suspicious and hostile looks being thrown in his direction by the staff... or was that just his imagination?

He asked his wife, "Does Lee know... does he understand what all the questions and interviews were about?"

Wearily, she replied, "Of course he does. He's a smart boy."

William had to make a concerted effort at keeping his expression neutral. He was worried that any show of nerves would be misinterpreted as guilt, so he tried to look as unconcerned as he possibly could and just portray the relieved father who had come to take his boy home. He even managed a smile when he stepped into the examination room where Lee was waiting.

Lee was not alone, nor was he lying down anymore. He was sitting up on the edge of his bed, facing his new roommate. The other bed was now occupied, but the curtain between the beds was not drawn over for privacy. An elderly woman was lying in the other bed, with an oxygen mask covering her nose and mouth. A young petty officer was sitting beside her, probably the woman's son. The enlisted man held the old woman's hand, but both he and the old woman were turned toward Lee, listening to him as he boy told them a story.

Lee told his audience, "Apollo was so outraged over what Pytho had done to his mother that he went to one of the older Lords, Hephaestus, and begged him for a weapon that could kill Pytho. Even though Apollo was still just a boy, Hepahaestus gave him a bow, and Apollo used it used to hunt down Pytho, shooting him a thousand times. And it was because he showed so much skill at such a young age that he gained recognition as one of the great Lords, and was called the Great Hunter."

"You really have been keeping up your history lessons," William commented with a smile toward his son.

Lee's face and his voice had been rather animated while passing on the tale of the ancient Kobolian lord to his small audience. The boy looked like he'd really been enjoying himself, but upon seeing his father, his demeanor immediately changed. He sat up a little straighter and his expression grew serious. William noted the change in his son with no small measure of disappointment.

The young petty officer stood quickly to attention and saluted the senior officer. "Good morning, Captain."

William returned the salute almost by reflex, but told the young man, "We're not on duty here. Please sit down and relax."

"Thank you, sir," the petty officer said, returning to his seat. "I guess you're here to take Lee home."

"Yes," William replied, walking over to stand beside Lee's bed. He looked questioningly at his wife. "Any last minute details we need to cover with the doctor before we can go?"

"No," she answered. "I've already covered everything. We were just waiting on the chauffeur."

William turned his attention back toward his son. Lee's left arm, from just below the elbow to down over his hand was wrapped now in a cast, and he was wearing a sling to bear the weight more comfortably. He looked a little tired, but had seemed to be in good spirits... at least he had been before William walked in. William wanted to say something to his son, something to put the boy at ease around him. He recalled how he had earlier promised himself, twice, that he would give Lee a proper hug, and he recalled Caroline's admonishment that he needed to let Lee know that he truly loved him. But now that the moment for just such actions appeared to be presenting itself, William found himself hesitating. He hadn't anticipated having an audience of strangers in the room, watching. So for the time being, he did nothing.

"Well Lee, I know you're anxious to go home," the old woman in the adjacent bed spoke up. Her voice was slightly muffled by the oxygen mask, but she was smiling. "Selfishly though, I wish you weren't going so soon." Her eyes looked up toward William's. "You've got a very special boy there Captain. He's been excellent company."

"Thank you," Caroline answered. She retrieved Lee's coat from a chair beside his bed.

Lee slid down off the edge of the bed, standing up. "I hope you feel better soon Helen," he told the old woman.

She smiled back at him. "I already do. Take care of that arm."

"I will," he told her. Caroline draped the coat around his shoulders and they started walking toward the door.

William followed his wife and son from the hospital, just as he had followed them out of the house earlier that morning. He walked just a few steps behind, while Caroline walked right beside Lee, her arm around his shoulders. It was obvious to William that there was such a close, easy bond between his son and wife. There were no walls between them. Lee had even been relaxed and chatty with two complete strangers in the emergency room. But with his father he was immediately on guard, reserved, and afraid to speak his mind. Around William, Lee acted like... well... like a junior officer addressing his senior.

_It's what I've taught him_, William realized. _Be strong. Stay focused. Follow orders. He doesn't play and laugh around me anymore, because that's not the way a warrior behaves. And he knows that's what I expect of him. But I never expected it this soon. Caroline's right. He's not a warrior yet. He'll make a fine one when the time comes, but he doesn't have to live that way now._

But how the hell could he explain all this to Lee? What the heck could he say? He _did_ want Lee to be grown up and responsible, to stay strong and focused, and be a good model for his little brother. He wanted Lee to respect him, and follow his instructions properly the first time. But somewhere along the line, in teaching Lee how to respect him, William knew he had failed to teach Lee how to love him. How could he possibly begin to amend that? The answer came to William as soon as he pondered the question. He had to teach Lee that he was loved.

Caroline's words echoed in William's head. "I told him that _I_ love him, no matter what, and that there should never, ever, be _anything_ that he should be afraid to tell me."

Now, William knew, it was his turn. But not right here. Not right now. It was too noisy and crowded at the hospital. This was something that required privacy between him and his son. As soon as they got home, William promised himself, he would have a talk with Lee, and give him that overdue hug.

* * *

Lee was yawning broadly when the car pulled in to the driveway. He'd very nearly fallen asleep during the short drive home. Caroline took him inside to get him settled while William retrieved Zak from the Mormonts' house. Zak boisterously tried to dash home to see his brother, but William managed to rein him in, warning him that Lee was very tired and would need to rest. 

"Does that mean we're not going to the beach today?" Zak asked.

"Not today, son."

Zak frowned in disappointment. Zak's mood, however, didn't stay down for long. Despite William's attempt to tone Zak down a little, the youngest Adama still hurried straight to the bedroom to bombard Lee with questions about his brief hospital stay.

From the hallway outside the boys' room William could hear Zak asking, "Did you see anybody who'd got shot?" and "Was there a lot of blood?"

"No Zak," Lee told his brother patiently. "I didn't see anything like that. Just an old lady in the bed next to me who had pneumonia."

"Aw," Zak whined in disappointment.

_Boys_, William chuckled. Leaving his sons to their reunion, William headed off to the kitchen to catch up with Caroline. She was standing in front of the open refrigerator door, examining the inventory. "I doubted that you would have had any breakfast at the hospital," he told her. "Did Lee get anything to eat?"

She nodded, with a grin. "They brought him some bland eggs and toast. He wasn't thrilled with it, but he ate it. I thought I'd go ahead and make him some pancakes though. He didn't eat much last night, after all, so he could probably use a decent meal."

"Why don't you let me handle that?" he suggested. "This was supposed to be your day off."

"I'll take a rain check," she replied, taking out a large bottle of milk, some eggs, and a tub of butter. "Besides, isn't there something else you should be doing right now?"

William rubbed at the back of his neck. "Zak is still interrogating him about the emergency room."

Caroline pulled open the door to the pantry to locate the box of pancake mix. "I'm sure Zak would step outside if you asked him to." She found the box, and a cylinder of ground cinnamon. "Then again, maybe it wouldn't be a bad idea if both boys were involved in the conversation." Hands full, she used her foot to push the pantry door shut.

William shifted uneasily. "I don't think that's necessary. Besides, I'll have to talk to Lee about the accusations the doctors were making and Zak doesn't need to hear about that."

Caroline retrieved a mixing bowl from a cupboard. "But he will hear about it," she sighed. "Lee will tell him. They tell each other everything. Besides, keeping unnecessary secrets was precisely what made this whole situation so much worse than it needed to be. I would think we wouldn't want to encourage that practice any more."

"Fair enough," William conceded. "But... let the boys have their chatter session so they can both settle down. And like you said, Lee hasn't had a decent meal in almost 24 hours and he was up all night. I think we ought to just let him relax, get some food into him... and let him sleep for a bit. He practically fell asleep in the car."

Caroline shook her head, but kept her attention on preparing the pancake batter. "You're not fooling anyone Bill."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"You're stalling."

"I'm not stalling," he said defensively. "He just got home from the hospital. Any kid would find that traumatic. I just want to give him a little break."

Caroline turned to face her husband. "A break from what?"

"If I go in there now, he's going to think he's in for another lecture."

"Then surprise him," she said pointedly. "Put his mind at ease instead. He'll rest a lot better knowing that his father loves him and would never be ashamed of him for not being combat-ready at age nine." She turned her back to her husband and continued preparing breakfast for herself and Lee.

William fumed for a bit, but didn't try to argue with his wife. How could he? She was right. He was stalling. He left the kitchen and walked toward the boys' bedroom but stopped in the hallway instead. He could hear the boys' voices, chattering away. He couldn't quite hear what they were talking about, but to his surprise he even heard them both laugh. Lee's laugh was just as loud as Zak's. Sadly, William realized he couldn't remember the last time he had heard Lee laugh. He stood for several seconds, just listening, reluctant to intrude. Finally, he stepped up and rapped a knuckle on the door before turning the knob and leaning into the room. Zak was still giggling, pen in-hand, as he tried to draw something on his brother's cast. Lee's expression, however, turned immediately serious, all traces of humor fading from his face. William felt a deep pang of regret.

"Lee..." William started to say. He needed to talk to his son. There were so many things he needed to tell Lee. But upon seeing the laughter vanish from his son's eyes as soon as he entered the room, William's mind drew a complete blank. He had absolutely no idea what to say next. So, instead of embarking upon that important father-son conversation, William simply said "Your mother told me you didn't get much of a breakfast at the hospital. She's making some pancakes. How many do you think you can eat?"

Lee's posture relaxed a little. He shrugged. "Four, I guess."

"I want four too," Zak piped up eagerly.

William couldn't help smiling at Zak. "You _did_ have a decent breakfast this morning."

"That was a long time ago," Zak replied.

"You're sure you're hungry?"

Zak nodded.

"All right, you can have some too. The food should be ready in just a few minutes. Why don't you come on out and wash your hands." Realizing then that one of Lee's hands was bound up in the cast, he inquired, "Do you need some help with that, Kiddo?"

Lee shook his head. "No sir. I can manage."

"All right," William acknowledged and backed out of the boys' bedroom. He walked into the living room and sat down in his chair, silently berating himself. He'd chickened out. What was his problem? He could take on Cylons, smugglers, and terrorists without blinking... why couldn't he face a crying child? And Lee hadn't even been crying!

"This is ridiculous," he whispered to himself. "Pull it together Husker." He needed to plan this out. Obviously, trying to talk to Lee off the cuff would never work. He needed to set it in his mind beforehand exactly what he wanted to say... and then hope that his brain wouldn't just turn to mush when he faced his son alone. After breakfast, he decided. He'd let Lee have his breakfast, and then they would talk.

Lee's eyes were growing droopy by the time he cleared his plate, but it was Caroline's eyes that troubled William the most. She said nothing to him when the boys came out of their room to eat. She didn't need to say anything. Her glare spoke volumes. She knew full well that William had dodged talking to Lee and her patience with her husband was nearly at an end. She sat down to eat with her sons while William sat off by himself in the living room, explaining that unlike Zak one breakfast was enough for him. When they were finished, Lee headed back for his room, yawning wearily. William watched him go, but didn't move to follow him.

"Zak," Caroline said, "would you help me in the kitchen?" Zak didn't look thrilled, but he didn't argue with his mother. He took his plate toward the sink. From the edge of the living room, Caroline said to her husband, "Well?"

William looked back at his wife. "You saw him," he said. "He can barely keep his eyes open."

"It shouldn't take you five minutes," she said in low tones. William hesitated, causing his wife to wince and shake her head. "Is it any wonder, Bill? Is it really any wonder why Lee would chose to be in pain rather than talk to you? You've taught him well." With that she turned her back and strode into the kitchen.

William stared at the floor for a few more seconds, then summoned his courage and went to talk to his son. When William stepped into the room Lee was sitting on his bed, fumbling with one hand to untie his shoelaces. "Need some help?" William offered.

Lee shook his head. "No Sir," he said. "I'll need to get the hang of it, for the next few weeks anyway." Lee had a little trouble with his left shoe, but his father let him handle it himself. After a few retries, he succeeded.

William brought the chair over from Lee's desk and set it beside Lee's bed. "Son," he said tentatively, "we need to talk." He took a seat, trying to hide just how uncomfortable he was.

To Lee, his father's voice sounded grave and very stern. Lee knew what that meant. He was in for another lecture. "Sir, I wasn't sneaking around last night," he whispered, hoping to fend off his father's anger.

William nodded. "I know. Peter told me. He said you took a hard fall while you were playing yesterday. That's why you came in so early before dinner, wasn't it?"

"Yes Sir." Lee swallowed.

"But you didn't say anything, to me or to your mother."

"I didn't know it was broken. It was just a little sore." He kept his face composed, but there was an unmistakable look of dread in his wide blue eyes. He was just waiting for the hammer to fall.

"Even so, you should have said something." William was trying his best not to sound harsh, but it took a concerted effort to keep his thoughts focused while facing his anxious son and he knew it was translating into a sharp edge within his voice.

Lee hung his head and nodded. Without looking at his father, he said, "It really didn't hurt much, and I know you hate it when... when we complain. It wasn't until later, when it started swelling, that it really hurt."

"Yet you _still_ didn't say anything. Your brother had to come wake us up in the middle of the night to let us know." Emotion was creeping into Lee's face now. William really hoped that Lee would not cry. In spite of his earlier intent to carefully plan out what he needed to say, the advanced preparation wasn't helping. His nerves were already turning upside down. Caroline was so much better at this. He considered enlisting her help, but decided against it. Lords knew what kind of withering glare she would turn loose on him if he walked out on this conversation now. He had to just forge on ahead in whatever fashion he could manage.

"Lee, I know that you think you were just... trying to be strong... like I've always encouraged you to be, but..." William lost his train of thought, and scrambled to find some direction. "You... you want to be a warrior someday. And it's true that whiners never become warriors. You have to be strong and able to handle a lot of discomfort, but hiding an injury Lee... that's not strength. If a warrior is hurt, if he breaks his arm... and tries to hide it... he could be putting lives at risk, and not just his own. He has a responsibility to make sure that he is fit for duty when he's called."

It began to dawn on William that he had fallen back on old habits and was lecturing again rather than engaging in the heart-to-heart discussion he'd intended. But this was what he knew how to do. This was how he corrected behaviors with his pilots: pointing out errors and providing instruction on what was expected. Lee was calm enough, and the boy was listening attentively, so William forged on ahead. Better to just keep the discussion going and work around to the father-son issues when the time was right.

He tried to steer the conversation in a direction that Lee would find at least bit more comforting. "Now accidents sometimes just happen, Son... like what happened with you. That's no cause for shame. But when that happens, it's your responsibility to get yourself taken care of properly as soon as possible, so that you'll again be fit for duty as soon as possible. To do anything else... it just creates an added burden on everyone around you. If you'd spoken up yesterday, we wouldn't have all been rushing around in the middle of the night, you wouldn't have spent hours in the hospital, and your mother... Lee, do you know what happened at the hospital this morning, with your mother?"

"You mean, with the lady from Family Services?" Lee asked quietly.

"Yes," William nodded. "Do you know why she was there?"

"Yes Sir," Lee whispered. "They weren't convinced at first that I just fell. They thought..." Lee's voice trailed off.

"They thought that you might have been abused," William finished for Lee.

Lee's eyes grew watery, but he faced his father. "I told her that you never hit us. I told her at least a dozen times."

"I know," William said solemnly. "So did your mother. And eventually they believed you. But Lee, do you have any idea how upsetting that was for her?"

Lee swallowed hard. "I'm sorry. I told Mom I was sorry."

"I'm sure you did, Son. But you know that would never have happened if you'd just spoken up in the first place."

Lee was silent for a short while then he stoically told his father, "I know that Sir. I'm sorry. And I'm sorry I disappointed you."

"Bill," Caroline's voice said tightly from the doorway. Neither of them had heard her approach. "Could you help me in the kitchen please?"

William looked at her in surprise. "Lee and I were just discussing..."

"Yes, I heard," she said quietly, her voice low and controlled. "But I really need your help _right now_."

His wife's expression left no room for doubt in William's mind that she was deadly serious. He stood up and told his son, "Get some sleep Kiddo. We'll talk again later." He followed his wife from the room, and pulled the door shut behind him. "I thought you _wanted_ me to talk to Lee," he said quietly.

"In the kitchen," she said quietly. "I've sent Zak next door." She led the way to the far end of the house, where she asked her husband incredulously, "What were you thinking?"

William was taken aback. "Caroline... what's going on? You all but pushed me through the door to talk to Lee, now you're yanking me back out before I can even finish!"

"Finish what? The lecture you were never supposed to start?" Even though they were as far from Lee's bedroom as the small house allowed, they both still made an effort to keep their voices low so that Lee would not overhear them. Caroline groaned. "You're supposed to be consoling him, not berating him!"

William sighed. "I wasn't berating him."

"I heard Bill. I heard that boy apologizing for being a disappointment to you. Why would he do that unless you were scolding him?"

"I was _discussing_ the situation with him," William argued. "Lee did make a very serious error in judgment Caroline. It won't be serving his best interest to just ignore that."

"Did you tell him that you love him?"

After a pause, William admitted, "Not yet."

"Why not?"

In answer to her question he responded with one of his own. "Did it escape your attention that I wasn't done in there? I fully intended to tell him and I might have even done so by now if you hadn't interrupted."

"Might have? When, Bill? At the _end_ of the lecture? That was the _first_ thing he needed to hear from you, not the last! He knows he made a mistake. Do you think he enjoyed spending the night in the emergency room? He does not need to be browbeaten over it. What he does need is to feel safe again about talking to his father! Good Lords Bill, don't you understand? This is exactly why Lee ended up spending the night in the hospital. _This_ is exactly what he was afraid of. Instead of easing his fears about you, you've just confirmed them all!"

"Fine!" William threw up his hands. "I admit it. I'm not very good at this. I'm a warrior. That's what I know. I know how to deal with other warriors. Being a parent doesn't come so naturally. It's so much easier for you, so... just tell me. What exactly should I do?"

She threw an arm out to the side, pointing in the direction of Lee's room. "Go back in there and tell that boy you love him. _Convince_ him of it. Tell him that he can make mistakes, fall on his face, make bad decisions... tell him he doesn't even need to ever be a warrior or a pilot... and that you will love him just the same."

William's face registered his shock at Caroline's suggestion. Tell Lee he didn't need to pursue being a pilot? How could he do that? It was Lee's dream to fly a viper some day, and there was no vocation more honorable than that. He couldn't tell Lee that he could just give up that dream. It would take much hard work and preparation to achieve that goal, and it would require focus and determination. Lee needed to be _encouraged_ to stay on course, not told that he could stray whenever he wanted.

Seeing the conflict playing out across her husband's face, Caroline told him, "If you can't manage that... and ONLY that... then just pack your bag and go on back to the Galactica right now. Stop making a bad situation worse and just let me handle it. _I _know how to talk to my son." She crossed her arms and stood firmly in place, waiting for an answer.

William had no answer to give her. He felt drained, mentally and physically. He walked from the kitchen, not even sure where he was going, or what he would do next. He wanted to go back to Lee's room and finish the conversation they had started, but... finish it how? There was so much he'd left unsaid and it pained him deeply to know that Lee felt so uncomfortable talking to him. Still, he felt like he had to try. He stood outside Lee's door, tumbling words and phrases around in his head, hoping the right combination would come to him. His hand settled almost unconsciously on the doorknob, and pushed the door open. Lee was asleep. William was ashamed to feel a rush of relief, but he closed the door again anyway and continued down the hallway to his own bedroom.

Now what?

He sat down on the bed and stared at the wall. Lee would probably sleep for several hours, but he would wake up before too long. What then? _I really don't know what to say to him_, William admitted to himself. _How can I convince Lee that he should feel comfortable talking to me, when I'm so edgy about talking to him? I can't. I'll never manage it. _

That realization hit William like a truckload of bricks. He dropped his head into his hands. Perhaps, when Lee got a little older, when he could deal with Lee on a more adult level, it would be easier for William to speak with his son. He hoped that would be the case. He just didn't know how to reach out to the child. For the time being, perhaps it really would be better to just let Caroline handle it. She was the one who knew how. He definitely did not want to risk saying the wrong thing, and driving Lee even farther away.

He stood up from the bed and silently began packing his bag.


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter 4**

"Hey Lee, Peter wants to see your cast!" Zak announced at full volume as he bounded through the front door, with Peter a few steps behind. Their footsteps pounded heavily down the hallway.

William winced and hurried to his own bedroom door. "Zak!" William hissed in a low voice into the hallway. "Keep your voice down. Your brother's asleep."

"Oh," Zak said, stopping just short of opening the door to his room. The door opened a second later anyway. "Hey, Dad said you were asleep."

"I was," Lee yawned. "Hey Peter."

"Hey Lee," Peter greeted his friend. "Sorry, we didn't know you were sleeping. I just wanted to sign your cast before Zak fills it up with all his drawings."

"Peter," Caroline said from the other end of the hallway, "why don't you come back tomorrow? Lee was up all night. He should be feeling better in the morning."

"Sure," he said. "I'll see you tomorrow Lee."

Lee gave his friend a tired smile. He pointed to his cast. "I'll save you an open spot."

Peter laughed and waved goodbye. Caroline closed the door behind him.

Zak was standing in the hallway staring at his father. "Daddy... are you leaving?"

William saw the eyes of his entire family now fall upon him. His packed duffle bag was sitting by the bedroom door and he was once again dressed in full uniform. All he was missing was his coat and cover. After an uncomfortable pause, he answered, "I'm afraid so Zak. Something came up and... I have to get back to the Galactica."

Lee and Caroline stood silently. Zak protested. "But you just got home."

"I know," he sighed. "I'm sorry." He looked down the hallway to his wife and said again. "I'm sorry."

"But what about Mommy's birthday?" Zak asked, on the verge of tears. "We never got to celebrate. And we never had movie night."

"Zak," Caroline said gently, "Daddy really does need to go." She shot her husband a withering look, but told her son, "You know he wouldn't leave unless it was very important."

William swallowed hard. He saw Lee glancing back and forth between his parents, then his eldest son's eyes dropped to the floor, his face looking downcast.

"Can you come back in a few days at least?" Zak asked, wiping his teary cheeks on his sleeve.

"I... I don't know Zak," William told him. "It's too soon to tell, but... I'll try to come back as soon as I can."

"Promise?"

William paused a moment, then told Zak, "I promise." Zak ran up to his father and hugged him. William hugged him back, struggling to stay composed. He disengaged himself from his youngest. Lee was still looking at the floor. "I need to call a cab," he said and stepped past his family to get to the phone in the living room.

The ten minutes that William waited for the cab's arrival were among the longest of his life. Zak was in tears, and his wife and oldest son said nothing to him. When he finally heard the cab pull up in front of the house, William was both relieved... and terribly ashamed. He donned his coat. Zak gave him another teary hug, and then ran off crying to his room.

"Lee...," William said to his son, who still stood silently, unable to meet his father's eyes. "Take care of the arm, Son. And look after your brother."

"Yes Sir," Lee whispered in reply, then turned away slowly and followed after his brother.

Caroline regarded him in the entry, her face expressionless.

"I am sorry," he told her. "I just don't know how to... how not to make things worse."

"Your cab is waiting," she said.

"Please... tell him..."

"Everything you couldn't," she said, completing his train of thought. "I will."

William nodded. He wanted to kiss her goodbye, but knew from the look on her face that it would be a mistake to try. He slung the duffle bag over his shoulder and headed for his cab. Dropping the bag on the back seat he felt in his coat pocket for his cover, but it wasn't there. "Hold on," he told the driver. "I'll be right back." He jogged back to the house and stepped quietly through the door. As he'd expected, his cover was on the end table in the living room, right beside the phone. His family was nowhere to be seen. He heard voices though, coming from the boys' bedroom. Zak was still crying and Caroline was attempting damage control.

"It was an emergency," William heard his wife say. "He didn't have a choice. You both know how important his job is."

"There was no emergency, Mom." That was Lee's voice, calm, but sorrowful. "The phone never rang. No one called for him. He left because of me. It's my fault."

William winced.

"Lee, no. It is NOT your fault," Caroline said emphatically. "Your father loves you. You do believe that, don't you?"

William paused, listening for Lee to answer. There was no answer.

Blinking hard to clear away a sudden surge of tears, William slipped out once more. When he reached the cab he nearly grabbed the duffle bag out and sent the car away, but after a few seconds of hesitation he climbed in and pulled the door shut.

* * *

William stared at the framed picture of his wife and two little boys. He'd seen that picture countless times, but he still could never help smiling at the happy faces of his children. They looked so young, so innocent. And Lee looked so blonde! William tended to forget these days that Lee was so fair-haired as a child. As he'd grown older, Lee's hair had naturally darkened considerably. Some people said that as Lee had matured he'd become more like his father, and less like his mother. Looking at the picture now, William felt a growing sense of regret for the changes that had gradually come over Lee. He'd once been so much like his mother, especially when he smiled. William could not now recall the last time that he had seen a genuine smile on his son's face. 

The photograph had been taken by Sheila Mormont on the occasion of Lee's 10th birthday. Caroline had taken their boys, along with a couple of Lee's friends, for a day at the beach. She had sent the picture to William via military post, along with a letter detailing the event, since William had been "unable to attend." He still had the letter somewhere, tucked into a keepsake folder, probably in the bottom drawer of his desk. He wasn't sure. He hadn't read it... or any of the other letters... for years. Most of the letters were from Caroline. The rest were from the boys, keeping William up-to-date on some recent event at school that William had missed. It used to be that William read the letters often. Some of them he'd even memorized. But after Zak died, no more letters had come. Nothing from Caroline... or from Lee. William simply hadn't had the heart to read the old ones anymore. Caroline had divorced him. Lee had disowned him. And Zak was gone.

The more that William stared at the picture, the more he felt a sense a shame. "I should have been there," he thought. He had experienced so much of his family's life through their letters instead of by participation. But that birthday in particular...

"I should have been there."

Lee's cast had come off his arm just a few days before. His relief at being able to play with his friends again was apparent in the photograph, written all over his smiling face, but William had not been there to see it in person. Neither had he been present to witness Lee's dejected tears after William had run away from home the day after Lee's arm was broken.

"That... that was the most cowardly act of my life," William whispered to himself. He had bolted back to the Galactica rather than finding a way to set things right with his son. So much had gone unsaid. He recalled also that more than once at the hospital, he had wanted... even _intended_... to hug his little boy. He had sworn to himself that he would do so, and would let the boy know he loved him. But it never happened. In fact, it had been another 20 years before William had embraced his son, and that was only after the world had come to an end.

It was on that horrible day of the Holocaust that he'd found Lee here, in the commander's quarters, staring at the very same photograph that William now held. Lee's eyes were tearing over the image of his mother from so long ago, but immediately upon realizing that his father was watching, Lee had stifled back his grief and tried to leave rather than allow his father to see him cry.

"I taught him to do that," William thought, regretfully. "I taught him that, long ago." Was it any wonder then, that when William tried to hug Lee on that terrible day, Lee didn't even know how to respond? It took Lee several seconds to accept his father's gesture and return the embrace. And the moments following had been filled with an awkward silence rather than familial comfort.

"I should never have left," William thought, recalling his hasty exit from home all those years ago. "I should have stayed, and found a way to talk to Lee. Because I didn't... that was the beginning of the end. Nothing was ever quite the same again."

Caroline had gone to work and their relationship had forever changed. He didn't blame her career for the slow deterioration of their marriage, but after Lee's accident, she had become less and less reliant on William's inclusion in the family. She had remained supportive and faithful to him, but she had gradually built a life of her own that did not include him, until eventually divorcing him altogether.

Lee had become more independent than ever. In fact he practically raised himself through his teenage years, and appointed himself to the role of Zak's surrogate father in William's regular absence. He never again turned to his father for guidance. Fortunately, Lee's choices and judgment always proved to be sound and responsible. Personal matters were never spoken of between father and son. It was as though Lee had learned that only matters of duty were suitable for discussion with his father. After all, that was all that his father ever bothered to discuss with him. There had still been happy times in the family, but there was an unspoken distance laid out between William and his wife and his eldest son that was never bridged again.

Only Zak had remained essentially unchanged over the years. Always the enthusiastic dreamer. Seldom practical. Usually relying on the guidance of his father or older brother to find his way. It wasn't until Zak had attempted, and failed, to qualify for entrance to flight school that William's guidance had conflicted with Lee's. William had been quite surprised to learn that Lee was trying to dissuade his younger brother from pursuing a flight career. Zak had dreamed of flying, just as Lee had, all his life. Or so William had believed. When William spoke pointedly with Zak on the subject, expressing his disappointment over Zak's poor performance, Zak ashamedly assured him that the failed entrance exam was a simple result of carelessness on his part, and he promised he would work diligently to earn his wings if given the chance. Lee however, had tried to encourage his brother toward studies in aeronautical engineering or navigation where Zak's gift for mathematics could be put to good use. Zak had actually quite excelled at math, once Lee had succeeded in persuading his brother to apply himself at school.

"He should be designing vipers, not flying them," Lee had said.

"He wants to fly," William argued. "He's wanted it his whole life."

"_You've_ wanted it his whole life," Lee countered.

William had paid no heed to his elder son's opinion, and only a few months later, Zak had died at the controls of a viper. The accident report concluded that although a mechanical malfunction had occurred, it was not an unrecoverable failure and the pilot should have been able to maintain control and land safely. The primary cause of the crash was determined to be "pilot error." Even so, William had not, at the time, been willing accept that he had erred in arranging for Zak's attendance at flight school. Lee had been absolutely infuriated at the funeral over his father's utter state of denial for any responsibility, and William once again faced a situation where he had no idea how to talk to his son. He had once hoped that as Lee grew older, it would be simpler for father and son to communicate as adults. Sadly, the opposite had occurred. As he was forced to face Lee's rage, William had been utterly clueless as to how he could even begin trying to bridge the chasm that had grown between them. Ultimately, Lee's response had been to give up on speaking to his father altogether. Only one son had been buried, but William had lost them both.

"I should have stayed," William said again. "Even if it took several tries to get it right back when Lee was a child, I should not have given up on learning how to talk to my son." Only the fortunate coincidence of their mutual survival of the Holocaust had brought them back together. William knew he'd been given a second chance with Lee and he knew he could not allow _this_ chance to slip by.

A knock on the hatch drew William's attention away from the photograph in his hand. He cleared his throat before calling out, "Enter."

With a heavy groan of shifting metal, the hatch was pushed open. Lee, dressed in his flight suit and looking quite weary, stepped into his father's quarters. "Colonel Tigh said you wanted to see me, Sir."

"Yes. Come in Captain." William set the photograph aside and stood up.

Lee shut the hatch behind him and stepped forward to the center of the commander's chambers before stopping to stand at attention.

"At ease Captain," William said. "How was your patrol?"

Lee shifted into a parade-rest stance. "Routine, Sir. Fortunately. Nothing unusual and I've already been fully debriefed by Colonel Tigh, since you were off-duty."

William offered his son a relaxed smile. "Relax Lee. This is strictly unofficial, and when I said, 'At ease,' I meant, 'Have a seat.'"

"Sir?" Lee sounded confused.

William waved at the long, curved sofa against the wall. "Sit down," he invited his son.

Lee hesitated. "Um... no disrespect Commander... but if this isn't anything official... could this wait till later Sir?" He swallowed, and then sounded apologetic when he added, "I just finished 14 hours in a cockpit, and I really need a quick shower and a bite to eat."

William took a moment to study Lee's face. "You do look pretty wiped." More sternly, he asked, "You're not still trying to cover Kara's shift in addition to your own, are you?"

"Not _entirely_ on my own," Lee mitigated. Seeing his father's frown, he added, "Commander, we have so many rooks in the squadron who still need mentoring, even on a simple patrol."

"I know," William nodded, understanding his CAG's logistical predicament.

"And with my very best pilot, who also happens to be the flight-instructor, on medical leave..."

"Lee, I understand all that," William interrupted. "But you can't mentor every rook in the squadron by yourself all the time, while still overseeing the entire air group."

"I'm not trying to, Sir," Lee assured him.

"More often than you should, Captain," the commander said. As soon he'd said it, he felt a flash of regret. When he'd asked Colonel Tigh to send Lee by after his patrol, he had not intended it to be a lecture session, but that was the direction this conversation was now moving. _I'm doing it again_, he thought. _Frak, I'm doing it again!_

Lee saw the look of distaste that settled over his father's face and interpreted it as disapproval directed at him. He sighed inwardly, but kept his outward appearance composed. "I'll review the schedule again Commander," he said, hoping to appease his father. "Perhaps Frosty and Stinger can step up their rotation."

William took a few seconds to get his thoughts straightened out. He could almost see Lee withdrawing away from him again and looking for the first opportunity to bolt for the door and escape his father's scrutiny. _Not this time_, William determined. _I'm not going to leave him with the wrong impression again._

"Son," he said quietly, "I just don't want you to forget that your well-being is just as important as that of any of your pilots."

Some of the tension eased away from Lee's posture. "I will try to keep that in mind, Sir."

"Good," William nodded. "Enough about that. The reason I really wanted you to stop by was this..." He retrieved a black, vinyl folder from the coffee table in front of the sofa and handed it to Lee. "I came across it in my desk this morning and I thought you might like to have it."

Lee flipped open the folder and felt his heart skip a beat. His throat felt suddenly tighter.

"Your mother sent me that photograph a few days after the ceremony," William told his son. "She thought I might like to see how you looked wearing your new captain's insignia... since I couldn't be there to see it in person."

Lee blinked to clear his eyes. The picture had been taken by the Atlantia's staff photographer immediately after Lee's mother had proudly pinned the new insignias onto her son's collar. Lee and his mother both faced the camera, with the Atlantia's bronze seal adorning the wall behind them. The room had been crammed full by the flagship battlestar's entire command staff and air group. Lee had not only been promoted to the rank of captain that day, but also decorated for valorous service. His mother had cried twice before the ceremony was over, but in the photograph she was smiling beautifully with clear bright-blue eyes that matched Lee's own.

"This...," Lee started to say, but was forced to stop and clear his throat. "I think this may have been the last picture... she ever took." Lee cleared his throat again and closed the folder. He took a deep breath and looked back toward his father. "Thank you, Sir," he said quietly.

"I know we weren't on speaking terms at the time," William said. "But I do regret that I wasn't there."

Lee looked away from his father. "It might have been very awkward if you had been, Sir."

"I know," William said. "But I still should have been there. And Lee... I do know there are many other occasions in your life that I should say the same about. Your tenth birthday, for instance."

That took Lee by surprise. "My tenth birthday?" Of all the important events in Lee's life that his father had missed, _that_ was the one he chose to single out?

"Do you remember when you broke your arm?" William asked.

Lee nodded. "Of course. Mom kept me inside after school for a month until the cast came off. I just about went stir crazy."

"Do you remember that I had just gotten home on leave, the day you broke your arm?"

"Yes. You got recalled back the next day."

"I didn't come home on leave again for almost nine months."

Lee regarded his father, listening carefully, but having no idea where this was going.

"Son, I have a confession to make," William said, removing his glasses. "I could have rescheduled my leave to be home for your birthday, but I didn't." After a long and awkward pause, he added, "In fact, I never really had to leave in the first place. I went away... and stayed away... because I was ashamed to face you, Son."

Lee appeared absolutely bewildered.

"I let you down. I let the whole family down, but you especially, because I know that I left you thinking it was your fault... that I was ashamed of you, instead of myself. The fact is Lee, I have never, _ever_, been ashamed of you. Even when things were at their very worst between us, I've always been proud of you. I'm very sorry that I ever gave you cause to doubt that. I should never have left that day... and I should have been there to see you promoted."

Lee stood in stunned silence for several seconds, staring at his father, unable to quite believe what he'd just heard. Had his father really just apologized? Lee had no idea how to respond. This had never happened before.

William cleared his throat and put his glasses back on. "Well... I won't keep you any longer Captain. You've just had a long flight, so get some rest." He turned away from Lee and headed toward his desk to break the tension in the air.

Lee dropped his gaze toward the floor, still looking stunned. Then his expression softened, and he became thoughtful. "You know," he said quietly, "something odd did happen at the end of the flight today."

William glanced back at Lee over his shoulder. "Did you include it in your report to Colonel Tigh?"

"No Sir."

"Why not?"

Disregarding his father's question, Lee recalled softly, "After 14 very long hours of patrolling, I was weaving my way back through the fleet, on approach to Galactica. And as I came within view of the ship, I thought, 'Almost home.' Then I thought, 'Home? That's weird. Why would I think of this place as home?'"

Lee lifted his gaze from the floor and looked toward his father. "I think... now I know why."

Now it was William's turn to stand in surprised silence.

This time, Lee broke the tension. "Thank you for the photograph Sir," he said. He nodded his head, saying, "Goodnight Commander."

William watched his son pull open the hatch. Just before Lee stepped through, he told him, "Have a good night Kiddo." Then the hatch swung shut and William was left alone. No, not really alone. Not any more. They may not have been in the same room, but William suddenly felt that for the first time in many years, he and his son had both just come home.


End file.
